Tragedy

[Bakershalfdozen]

Has this recent discovery of the hate list changed the social worker's mind about the veracity of your son's accusations?

[John81]

Has this recent discovery of the hate list changed the social worker's mind about the veracity of your son's accusations?

The social workers don't know about this yet. The woman who is in charge of our case should be here on Friday.

My Dad said if these people had any smarts at all they would reconsider all this but they probably won't.

I'll just have to wait and see what they think about it all come Friday.

We were discussing the anger management classes they say I have to take the last time she was here. She told me the reason the preparation session (more like an interview) for those classes can take so long (the anger management lady told me one and a half to two and a half hours!) is because we will have to go over my history of violence. I told her the meeting shouldn't last long at all then since I have no history of violence.

My wife affirmed to these people that I've never hit her or threatened her and that I've never abused the children but that seems to mean nothing to them. :roll

They seem to just take the childs word, regardless of what the parents say, and regardless of the fact there is no evidence of me being violent, having anger problems or having a violent history.

Truth and reality seem to have little meaning to them.

Which reminds me...when the social worker asked us about rules that we have I mentioned the Ten Commandments. She stated that the Ten Commandments can't be kept and are therefore unrealistic and not really appropriate as a basis for the rules of our home! :eek

[trc123]

The social workers don't know about this yet. The woman who is in charge of our case should be here on Friday.

My Dad said if these people had any smarts at all they would reconsider all this but they probably won't.

I'll just have to wait and see what they think about it all come Friday.

We were discussing the anger management classes they say I have to take the last time she was here. She told me the reason the preparation session (more like an interview) for those classes can take so long (the anger management lady told me one and a half to two and a half hours!) is because we will have to go over my history of violence. I told her the meeting shouldn't last long at all then since I have no history of violence.

My wife affirmed to these people that I've never hit her or threatened her and that I've never abused the children but that seems to mean nothing to them. :roll

They seem to just take the childs word, regardless of what the parents say, and regardless of the fact there is no evidence of me being violent, having anger problems or having a violent history.

Truth and reality seem to have little meaning to them.

Which reminds me...when the social worker asked us about rules that we have I mentioned the Ten Commandments. She stated that the Ten Commandments can't be kept and are therefore unrealistic and not really appropriate as a basis for the rules of our home!

Well at least the social worker got it right about not being able to keep the Law......she's ripe to hear about Jesus being our righteousness!

[John81]

Well at least the social worker got it right about not being able to keep the Law......she's ripe to hear about Jesus being our righteousness!

Sadly, she seems to have a dim view of Christianity and perhaps a hardened spirit about it.

This woman, who is supposed to make sure we have our lives together or get it together, is divorced, makes fun of her new husbands name (Leslie), admits she treats her two children very differently, refuses to cook even if no one else is around to cook (she either orders out or tells everybody to eat cereal), thought brown cows is where chocolate milk came from until she was in her teens...etc.

[Guest Guest]

My advice, John...is to get away from this social worker. ASAP. If they are tied to the state and government...I smell a rat already. Actually, I think the man from your church who wanted to help with counseling is the better choice. IMHO. Also, as far as health insurance goes? Have you ever heard of the "Christian Brotherhood"? My in-laws have had them for years and it has been the biggest blessing for them. With my FIL being self-employed and the # of children they raised, and are still raising, it would have been an unbelievable amount of money spent on health insurance for all these years. The "Christian Brotherhood" has been there for many Christians over the years. :amen:

[bzmomo7]

The social workers don't know about this yet. The woman who is in charge of our case should be here on Friday.

My Dad said if these people had any smarts at all they would reconsider all this but they probably won't.

I'll just have to wait and see what they think about it all come Friday.

We were discussing the anger management classes they say I have to take the last time she was here. She told me the reason the preparation session (more like an interview) for those classes can take so long (the anger management lady told me one and a half to two and a half hours!) is because we will have to go over my history of violence. I told her the meeting shouldn't last long at all then since I have no history of violence.

My wife affirmed to these people that I've never hit her or threatened her and that I've never abused the children but that seems to mean nothing to them. :roll

They seem to just take the childs word, regardless of what the parents say, and regardless of the fact there is no evidence of me being violent, having anger problems or having a violent history.

Truth and reality seem to have little meaning to them.

Which reminds me...when the social worker asked us about rules that we have I mentioned the Ten Commandments. She stated that the Ten Commandments can't be kept and are therefore unrealistic and not really appropriate as a basis for the rules of our home!

I would have asked her how many of the commandments she could name. :lol Has your son expressed to you just what it is he wants? I mean, does he understand the consequences that he is a minor and he will have to be under SOMEONES authority regardless until he is 18? If he wants to remain in your care there are some things he is going to need to comply with because at some point you may not be able to fight state intervention. If he is trying to fight you because he wants to leave then I think your idea of getting him full-time help living elsewhere for a while may be the best bet. Otherwise his antics may just escalate. How scary and frustrating. Will continue to pray for your son and family, John. Please keep us updated. I'm so sorry you are having to go through all of this. How is your health issues? Are you doing ok? Let us know if there is anything else we can pray for you about.

[JerryNumbers]

I'm just thinking with my keyboard. But there is no way to get clear of this social worker except to move to another state and they not no where you've gone to.

Now if you were able to move to another state, them you could get whatever type help you thought was right, like sending him to that place in Missouri you have spoken of and or they might be something else some where.

But many people do not have the resources to do such thing, for that could be very costly, I know I wouldn't have it.

I'm trying to look on the bright side of this, at least all of this has come about before something bad and drastic happened. Many times that is not the case.

What the social worker said sounds about normal for a none Christian social worker, but I don't know if they would let a true Christians be a social worker. Seems she is again teaching children not to lie or murder or steal.

[John81]

My advice' date=' John...is to get away from this social worker. ASAP. If they are tied to the state and government...I smell a rat already. Actually, I think the man from your church who wanted to help with counseling is the better choice. IMHO. Also, as far as health insurance goes? Have you ever heard of the "Christian Brotherhood"? My in-laws have had them for years and it has been the biggest blessing for them. With my FIL being self-employed and the # of children they raised, and are still raising, it would have been an unbelievable amount of money spent on health insurance for all these years. The "Christian Brotherhood" has been there for many Christians over the years. [/quote']

The social worker was appointed to us by the state. She works for Children and Family Services, or whatever they call themselves these days. She has to approve who counsels our son according to whatever state guidelines she has to follow. She's not a counselor, just a caseworker who, by state regulations, must stop by and ask us a myriad of pointless questions.

Never heard of the Christian Brotherhood but I will check into that.

Thank you.

[John81]

I would have asked her how many of the commandments she could name. :lol Has your son expressed to you just what it is he wants? I mean, does he understand the consequences that he is a minor and he will have to be under SOMEONES authority regardless until he is 18? If he wants to remain in your care there are some things he is going to need to comply with because at some point you may not be able to fight state intervention. If he is trying to fight you because he wants to leave then I think your idea of getting him full-time help living elsewhere for a while may be the best bet. Otherwise his antics may just escalate. How scary and frustrating. Will continue to pray for your son and family, John. Please keep us updated. I'm so sorry you are having to go through all of this. How is your health issues? Are you doing ok? Let us know if there is anything else we can pray for you about.

I'm trying hard to make sure I don't seem confrontational or argumentative about anything. One of their state stipulations is that we "cooperate fully" so I've been minding my tongue.

Tim says he wants to stay with us but my wife and I really believe that's no longer an option. He knows the rules, knows right from wrong yet continually chooses to go against them and we really have no way of changing that. With the continual escalation of the seriousness of the wrongs/sins he's doing we are fearing that he may end up hurting someone or himself, or (God forbid :pray ) killing someone.

He's convinced that anything he decides to do is okay and justified simply because he wanted to do it. He views those who question or try to stop him from doing what he wants to do as being wrong and his enemies. He believes his lies are true because that's what he wants to believe.

I warned him just a week ago about the serious nature of all this stuff he's brought upon us. I told him that if he got into any trouble at school or elsewhere the police or government workers would come in and take him away and his mom and I couldn't stop it. When I reminded him of this he just said, "I don't remember you saying that." Which is what he always says when I remind him or ask him about something I've told him about. The simple fact is, he doesn't pay attention and only bothers to remember or think about what he wants to.

It's very sad and frustrating but for some reason he's hardened his heart. Even after the police talking with him, myself talking with him and his mother talking with him and explaining how serious and wrong his "death list" was he refuses to acknowledge it as such and continues to insist there was nothing wrong with it. He has shown not a tiniest bit of remorse or sorrow, let alone any understanding of guilt. In his mind, he's right in whatever he does and all others are wrong and just out to get him.

I truly appreciate your prayers. I do believe the prayers of my brothers and sisters here have been a major factor in sustaining me/us through this tragedy.

I'm feeling okay right now. Friday I have x-rays taken and a doctors appointment to see if we got all of the kidney stone out of my system. Please pray the stone is completely gone and no further treatments or surgeries will be needed.

My wife needs to have an MRI on her right knee, which will most likely need surgery.

Please pray we may be able to get Tim into a good Christian home for youth that may help him.

[HappyChristian]

Oh, John, I am so sorry this has happened!!! Am praying....

[Guest Guest]

Please pray we may be able to get Tim into a good Christian home for youth that may help him.

John...why don't you contact Dr. Jack High at "Solid Rock" (let him you know me from Cleveland, OH)? I will PM you with my last name. He will know that last name! LOL. One of My BIL's went on a missionary trip to Mexico with him years ago. Also, my old IFB church supports them.


He might be able to direct you in the right path for Tim. Dr. High was a troubled youth himself. He and his wife have helped countless girls...and now the boys' home. They are an off-shoot of Lester Roloff and another IFB man (the name is escaping me) that other's would know. They are good Christian men! God bless you and your family. :Bible:

[John81]

In all His long ages of time, God is at
work for our good. In prosperity, He
tests our gratitude; in mediocrity, He
tests our contentment; in misfortune, He
tests our submission; in darkness, He
tests our faith; in the middle of
temptation, He tests our steadfastness;
and at all times, He tests our obedience
and trust in Him.

-Author Unknown

[Lee-Anne]

:pray Continuing in prayer John. Asking our saviour to turn your son's heart.

[John81]

Well I just received a phone call from the high school principal and Tim has been expelled for 10 days pending a board hearing. According to him the policy the board must follow means Tim will be expelled completely at the board hearing.

There is some form of alternative school, where they send the trouble makers, that Tim can attend if he goes through a psychiatric evaluation (and passes) at a hospital 90 some miles from here. If we were to go that route, he would have to attend that school for one year with no problems before he would be allowed to return to the regular high school.

Earlier today I spoke with the Christian home in Missouri and they said it will take them about 5-10 business days to process things and set up an interview with us.

This Christian home has their own Christian school, church, etc. They have job assignments for everyone, everyone must attend school, chapel, and there are various Bible study groups and other programs and helps.

[Lee-Anne]

May God give you wisdom and have His perfect will in Tim's life. May our God of comfort, comfort the heart of you and your wife even now. :pray