Tithing Can Sometimes Become A Source Of Conflict In Marriage Relationships

[The Glory Land]

I have this message posted on my website, to share with my visitors. 

 

Tithing can sometimes become a source of conflict in marriage relationships. If you and your spouse disagree about giving, spend some time learning about biblical stewardship. If prOBlems persist or one of you is an unbeliever, there may be other scriptural principles that come into play. Tithing When Your Spouse OBjects by Crown Financial Ministries God's Word describes the tithe as a testimony to God's ownership. It was through the tithe that Abraham acknowledged God's ownership. Thus, God was able to direct and prosper him (Gen 14:20).1 God's freedom cannot be experienced in the area of finances unless: • God's ownership is acknowledged over everything and our role of stewards who have been placed over his possessions is accepted.2 . The first part is surrendered back to God. • There is an understanding that God supplies a surplus above basic needs in order to help those in need.3 In the Old Testament the Hebrew people brought approximately 23 percent of their increase to the Lord's storehouse -- a physical storehouse. The keepers of the storehouse, the Levites, in turn used what was given to care for the widows, needy foreigners in the area, orphans, and the Levites. In the New Testament, the people no longer brought their tithes and offerings to a physical storehouse; instead, they gave of their increase in tithes, offerings, and alms to the church body. The church then used the tithe for spreading the gospel. The offerings were used for the general and administrative support of the church, and alms were used to care for the poor, widows, orphans, and needy. Conflict Over Tithing Because tithing involves money, it is a prime candidate for controversy between a husband and wife. However, if both spouses are Christians, they should have a desire to please the Lord. It's important for both spouses to be trained in God's principles of finance. That way, they'll understand tithing is God ordained, not just a personal desire that one spouse is trying to impose on the other.4 Giving should come from the heart. As such, tithing is not a law but, rather, an indicator of OBedience to all of God's laws. Because the tithe's purpose is to be an individual or family testimony of God's ownership, it was never intended that everyone should give the same amount or in the same way but that each should give bountifully and cheerfully (see 2 Cor 9:6-7). If One Spouse is an Unbeliever The prOBlem becomes more complicated when one spouse is an unbeliever. Because it is the responsibility of the husband to be the leader in his home, if the wife is an unbeliever, husbands must OBey the Lord's direction. Husbands need to understand, however, that the Lord is more concerned about the wife's soul than money. If tithing becomes an OBstacle to the wife, husbands should consider not tithing temporarily in order to win their wives to the Lord. Husbands need to counsel their wives, pray with them, and seek their opinion and direction, but according to God's Word the decision is ultimately the husband's.5 Because most wives in America today are looking for the strong leadership that seems to be lacking in many marriages, husbands need to take the lead regarding tithing. If the unbelieving spouse is the husband, then the believing wife should submit to his wishes and trust that her submissive attitude will win him to the Lord (1 Pet 3:1-6). Remember it is not the money but the attitude of the heart about which the Lord is most concerned. If wives have made commitments to give and their husbands OBject to giving, God sees the desire of the wives' hearts to tithe and he will honor that commitment, even though wives honor their husband's wishes. God will bless because of the wife's attitude, not because of giving.6 However, a wife might still ask her husband to let her give an amount smaller than the tithe for at least a year. If, at the end of the year, the family is worse off financially as a result of giving, she will agree to stop giving. But if the family is better off, then the husband may agree to give more. In Mal 3:10, the Lord says to test him in this thing (tithing). Often this is just the opportunity for God to prove himself real to a doubting spouse. Conclusion Giving the tithe is the outward expression of inner commitment -- or lack of it. It is material and financial surrender prompted by spiritual surrender. However, if couples do not tithe because one spouse OBjects to tithing, then the subject should be placed "on the back burner," until they are able to discuss and study the principles of tithing together. Larry Burkett, Your Finances in Changing Times, Moody, 1975, p. 103 Austin Pryor, Sound Mind Investing, Moody, 1996, p. 488 Larry Burkett, Your Finances in Changing Times, Moody, 1975, p. 102 Larry Burkett, Giving and Tithing, Christian Financial Concepts, 1996, p. 7 Larry Burkett, Answers to Your Family's Financial Questions, Living Books, 1998, p. 164 Larry Burkett, Giving and Tithing, Christian Financial Concepts, 1996, pp. 11-12 Larry Burkett is the co-founder of Crown Financial Ministries. He has written over 50 books including the best-selling How to Manage Your Money. Larry and his wife live in Gainesville, Ga. Crown Ministries merged with Christian Financial Concepts to create Crown Financial Ministries , the world's largest Christian financial ministry. The merger combines Christian Financial Concepts' focus on teaching biblical financial principles through broadcast media, seminars, resource materials, and volunteer budget counselors with Crown Ministries' small-group stewardship studies in thousands of churches around the country. Reprinted with permission from Crown Financial Ministries , Gainesville, Ga.

[Standing Firm In Christ]

You need to change #3. The Hebrews did not bring their tithe to the storehouse. They took it to the Levite. The Levite would take a tenth of the tithe they received to the storehouse.

Read Nehemiah 10:37-38

[Standing Firm In Christ]

Also, where in the New Testament did the believers take tithes to a Church? I find no such Scripture in my Bible.

[Salyan]

Green = hard to read. Please change to normal font in accordance with the Board's rules.

[Pastor Matt]

Usually when I see posts with this formatting I ususully don't read them. In my opinion, the green is ugly and it hurts my eyes.

[The Glory Land]

Your wish is my command...   

[The Glory Land]

Also, where in the New Testament did the believers take tithes to a Church? I find no such Scripture in my Bible.

 

How much should I give then, to help support my local church? Give me a number...

[Standing Firm In Christ]

How much should I give then, to help support my local church? Give me a number...

 

I cannot say. Nor should anybody else.  You need to decide for yourself how much you want to give.  If you allow others to dictate the amount, then it is not out of love, but OBligation.

[John81]

If you seek the Lord on the matter of giving, as we all should, the Lord will direct our giving in accord with His will for us. Thus far, the Lord has always directed me to give a specific amount, never a percentage.

[Standing Firm In Christ]

To be fair though, John.. any fixed amount is a percentage of something.  If God told you to give 23 dollars of your 460 dollar check, you would give 5%.

But I know what you are saying.. and agree

[John81]

I get your point, but since our paychecks fluctuate and the amount the Lord has us give typically stays the same for a year or more, the percentage wouldn't be constant.

 

I'm speaking only of our weekly giving, which doesn't include other giving to the church or elsewhere.

[ThePilgrim]

How much should I give then, to help support my local church? Give me a number...

How often must we go over this?  Monthly? Weekly? Daily?

 

God bless,

Larry

[mkrishna]

If you seek the Lord on the matter of giving, as we all should, the Lord will direct our giving in accord with His will for us. Thus far, the Lord has always directed me to give a specific amount, never a percentage.

Amen, I do the same. Giving should be from the heart.

[Miss Daisy]

GloryLand   QUIT !!!

[John81]

That seems to be his "gift".