Tragedy

[trc123]

trc I appreciate your post, but I think John's situation is more extreme than you realize...we have been following this for awhile now, as every so often he would mention problems with his son. There is also a spiritual battle going on here too.

Also should mention that there are lots of things to say "yes" to our children...and at least in my family, having longer hair or piercing their ears (even the homemade kind LOL that was kinda funny) will never be an option for my kids.

Totally understood. I hope my post didn't come across as being judgmental or making light of the situation. I did not mean it that way, I was just sharing some perspective as I was praying and thinking back concerning such circumstances. And yes, of course, the parents are the final authority in rearing their children, absolutely.

P.S. Trust me, I didn't want an ear ring for our son anymore than the wife did..........I just used a different tactic for helping him learn a lesson, rather than the frontal assault.

[Anon]

Sounds similar to the ones who let their kid try a cigarette at a young age...so they get sick...and ditch the idea forever. LOL. Effective, but I'm sure often backfires and then you have a bigger mess than you started with.

[trc123]

Sounds similar to the ones who let their kid try a cigarette at a young age...so they get sick...and ditch the idea forever. LOL. Effective' date=' but I'm sure often backfires and then you have a bigger mess than you started with.[/quote']

Actually, I caught him smoking as a teenager and made him smoke an entire pack of camel no filters in one sitting in front of his mother and I. He was totally embarrassed, turned green, vomited, took a hot shower, went to bed and no longer smokes cigarettes. He is married and has two children of his own and occasionally comments about the difficulties of being a parent and how smart he now thinks his mom and I are (we used to be so dumb.....lol).

[Bakershalfdozen]

John, my heart breaks for your family. May God grant you parents wisdom and may He fight for you against the gov't who has no business in your family. Contact the CLA. They specialize in defending Christian families against corrupt gov't and corrupt systems.

[deafnva77]

it's a nice lesson, but it also illegal for adult to assist smoking to underage. These days, it is.

[Anon]

Oh I definitely wasn't advocating it. LOL.

[deputydog530]

Just wondering... are the social workers there like here? 80% of them dont have kids and half arnt married, yet they seem to know everything about raising kids, (or they think they do). :loco

[Anon]

Just wondering... are the social workers there like here? 80% of them dont have kids and half arnt married' date=' yet they seem to know everything about raising kids, (or they think they do). :loco[/quote']

No kidding...usually liberal women who have a couple dogs....right? LOL....

[deputydog530]

Yep, you nailed that one :loco :bonK:

[John81]

I was listening to part of a sermon today and the pastor talked about how Christ came to divide, how being a Christian causes division.

That got me to thinking about how Tim has repeatedly specifically rejected Christ in favor of the world. Of course he's resisted obeying God for years, but now he's of age and has specifically rejected Christ. I do believe that's opened the door for Satan to work and this could partly have something to do with all of this.

It really does feel as if our family has come under serious spiritual attack these past two months. My wife and I both having health problems (me, kidney stones, my wife with a knee that's probably going to need surgery), and then all this trouble that's been brought on by Tim.

I'll admit there were some very dark days for me in August when I wasn't even allowed to go to my own home or see or speak to my wife or children, I hadn't a clue what social workers were up to, didn't know what the police or judge might say, etc. Thanks be to God, I made it through and since being back home I've put specific effort into making sure I have my prayer times and I focus them, that I take extra time to read and study the Word of God beyond my morning reading, that I keep in prayer throughout the day, that I take the time to think of things to praise and thank God for, etc. It's certainly not easy but I'm determined to come through this valley with my faith strengthened and walking in step with God.

One of the social workers is divorced, on her second marriage, admits she treats her two children very differently, refuses to cook, won't dust the house and makes fun of her second/current husband because "he has a girls name"; his name is Leslie. She also seems about half goofy from the stories she tells.

The other social worker has never mentioned family at all. She gives off the impression she believes all children are virtually perfect and innocent and parents just don't understand their own children like she does.

Oh, I forgot to mention they now want my wife to take some sort of evaluation. They are basically accusing her of not caring about her own family! :loco

It's bad enough with most of the attacks hitting me, but now they are trying to target her too.

Thank y'all so very, very much for your words and prayers!

[Anon]

I would definitely contact HSLDA and CLA and at least ask them if they can be of help.

[JerryNumbers]

Its always great to have someone tell you your wrong and they don't know how to do it their self. Many times that is exactly how it is though.

Many of those who get in positions to help other have a history of a messed up life.

[John81]

It's so frustrating that our son can lie all he wants and they believe it all without question while my wife and I tell the truth and are automatically considered to be liars if anything we say doesn't match what our son has said. :loco

As I mentioned, they now want my wife to be evaluated because they are claiming she exhibits signs of a "lack of empathy". In other words, they are trying to say she doesn't care about her children, husband, family. :thumbdown

The reason? Because my wife didn't see or try to stop all the abuse (that never happened) that our son is claiming. This is nothing short of a Catch-22 situation. How could she be aware of, and care about, abuse that wasn't happening? Yet, according to them, it had to have been happening simply because our son says so.

I admitted to spanking on occasion. My wife admitted she knew I spanked on occasion. We both told them all the other stuff he claimed was not true and even the lead "child care" (whatever they call themselves) investigator stated that my wife's story and my own matched (we were questioned separately) but that he believed our son was telling the truth! So we were/are automatically liars because they seem to automatically want to believe the child.

It's like last week when I went to the intake meeting for the anger management classes. I was told the interview would take one and a half to two and a half hours because they had to go over "my violent history". Well, I have no violent history (which I've told them repeatedly), so the interview actually only took 45 minutes; mostly to answer some stupid and poorly written questions on their standard government issued forms.

So, I attend the first meeting (oh, and I have to pay for these; 25 dollars for the intake and 10 dollars for each meeting, 30 meetings total!), and there are six other guys in there, at least three looked like they just walked out of prison, and all of them are in there for abuse against their wives or girlfriends. The whole class is geared towards wife/girlfriend abusers so I just sit there listening to them tell their stories for two hours.

Sorry, it seems I'm ranting or rambling, but I do appreciate the chance to share this, which reminds me that the Word says we are to share one anothers burdens, which reminds me of just how very thankful I am that y'all have been so kind and gracious in sharing mine. Thank you!!!

[matie-k]

Wow - the whole situation is just nuts! The "system" is nuts too! Praying for you and your family! I'm so sorry this has happened to you.

One thing that I find amazing and very hard are these verses:
1 Peter 4:12 Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you:
1 Peter 4:13 But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ's sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.
1 Peter 4:14 If ye be reproached for the name of Christ, happy are ye; for the spirit of glory and of God resteth upon you: on their part he is evil spoken of, but on your part he is glorified.

It seems ingrained in man that we expect life to have some sense of peace and normalcy, and when something really terrible happens, we tend to recoil in shock - "thinking it strange"! But instead we're supposed to rejoice? That's really tough sometimes. But when you think of Christs sufferings and think that Christ will be glorified by your sufferings, I hope you can take comfort in that.

[John81]

Wow - the whole situation is just nuts! The "system" is nuts too! Praying for you and your family! I'm so sorry this has happened to you.

One thing that I find amazing and very hard are these verses:
1 Peter 4:12 Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you:
1 Peter 4:13 But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ's sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.
1 Peter 4:14 If ye be reproached for the name of Christ, happy are ye; for the spirit of glory and of God resteth upon you: on their part he is evil spoken of, but on your part he is glorified.

It seems ingrained in man that we expect life to have some sense of peace and normalcy, and when something really terrible happens, we tend to recoil in shock - "thinking it strange"! But instead we're supposed to rejoice? That's really tough sometimes. But when you think of Christs sufferings and think that Christ will be glorified by your sufferings, I hope you can take comfort in that.

Katie!

It's so pointed that you quote what you did. Last week the Lord led me to read and study First Peter. When I came to those verses I spent much time in meditation and prayer; listening to the Lord.

Shortly before all this began it really seemed like things were going very well, in the spiritual sense and the physical. I was growing closer to the Lord, my prayer life had increased, I had set aside a special intercessory prayer time each night, etc.

I've noticed in my life that whenever I'm making notable progress in my walk with the Lord some attack comes about. Of course, I wasn't expecting what happened or any sort of attack or trial that would hit us like this and for such a long duration, but here it is.

I do believe that at least part of what is going on is the devil is trying to devour our family and overwhelm me with physical and spiritual attacks.

Thanks be to my Lord who never leaves me nor forsakes me, and thanks to everyones prayers, I've regrouped and determined to excercise my faith, trust in the Lord, spend even more time in the Word, spend even more time praying to my Heavenly Father, take even more time seeking the guidance of the Holy Ghost.

When I came out of the doctors office Friday with the news I still had a huge part of that kidney stone in me that could be very hazardous and needed dealt with soon I was very down. The Lord brought to my mind the bit of a song I had in my head before I saw the doctor, "You are my God and I will always praise you." I thought right there that "always" means even when things don't go as I wanted. I also thought of a scene from the movie "Facing the Giants" where the coaches wife is in the parking lot of the doctors office after being told she's not pregnant and she prays to God that even if He never lets her have a child she will still love him. So, while driving from the doctors office back to the hospital I praised God and expressed my trust in him. I still "felt" down physically, but my spirit was uplifted and that night I purposefully set forth to give thanks and praise to God in prayer for all the good things in my life even during this deep and long valley.

Praise God!