7 reasons why people leave church

[tired]

I was listening to Greg Locke and he gave 7 reasons why people leave churches. This was according to "Christianity" Today.
7. Preacher is not friendly
6.Nothing for the kids
5. Facilities are filthy
4. All about money
3. Not exciting enough
2. I am not getting fed
1. Somebody offended me

One thing I realized, and Bro. Locke pointed out, was there wasn't one about heresy, apostasy, linking up with heretics or apsotates. What do you guys think about this list?

[Jerry]

Perhaps those are the average reasons in Christendom why people leave specific churches (or leave church attending altogether). Most of Christendom doesn't practice separation. However, there are many churches I have left (after visiting or attending) due to their apostasy or false teachings, or even due to their ecumenicalism.

[tired]

Me to I have left a few over doctrine. It is "Christianity" Today, so it is the majority of denoms, but I have seen alot of IFB people leave over these reasons too.

[IM4given]

I was listening to Greg Locke and he gave 7 reasons why people leave churches. This was according to "Christianity" Today.
7. Preacher is not friendly
6.Nothing for the kids
5. Facilities are filthy
4. All about money
3. Not exciting enough
2. I am not getting fed
1. Somebody offended me

One thing I realized, and Bro. Locke pointed out, was there wasn't one about heresy, apostasy, linking up with heretics or apsotates. What do you guys think about this list?

Can we add those to the list?

8. Tired of the Social Clubs and "cliques" who called it a Bible meeting, but showed an r-rated movie to the group instead! And dont even get me started about the "refreshments" that were served.
9. Preacher stood up and used every bible except the KJV and never mentioned Sin, Salvation or Repentance one time in his whole 15 minute monologue.
10. Got a crick in my neck from trying to sing to the powerpoint song up on the screen.
11. Being the only female wearing a dress, with long hair and a KJV Bible I felt uncomfortable and out of place.

[5dumplings@home]

I would add that the Pastor has consistantly offended a member and refused to acknowledge that he could possibly be at fault in the matter.

Little offenses are one thing, but when a pastor chooses a man to be a fall guy for his pettiness...that's entirely different.

[Anon]

We should add something else to the general list... "Church standards are too high...I feel uncomfortable."

I mentioned in another thread we just had a family leave because their son was at our church getting too on-fire for God...called to ministry...wants to go to Bible college...gave up his rock music....wants to have standards and seperation...and the younger sister hated church and God and the parents evidently couldn't handle their son being so "goody goody" so they left the church and their son comes alone. He only has one more year left of high school so he's on to Bible college after that.

We have another teenager, good friend of his, on fire for God and his mom (who does not attend) thinks we're brainwashing him. Praise God for teens with the ability to stand up for right! However it seems alot of people these days do leave churches for the above reason, and it was not mentioned in the original list.

Also I wanted to validate, by "church standards" I mean the overall tone of the church, not "rules"...I'm just saying regular Biblical seperation, not IFBx.

[SouthernGal]

#8 ??? an r-rated movie in a church??
#10 is quite interesting.....as a lot of churches use the screens today.

Anyway, how about members stirring up problems within the church? Do any of you have that problem in the church? Very disturbing!

[axiom]

8. Lack of desire to worship, Love, Praise Jesus.



We must have the constant desire to seek truth in our understandings by praying to god to our lord Jesus christ to lead us where he wants us to be.

It is our responsibility as Christians to fellowship, and lead the lost to Jesus.

Don't forget, the devil works on church's. Don't let him win!

God Bless :smile

[Guest Guest]

I found a pamphlet on "Why and How to Leave A Fundamental Church." I will share with everyone the section entitled..."WHY to Leave." You seldom hear of a Bible-believer leaving a Bible-believing church over doctrine or Biblical issues. The vast majority leave fundamental churches because of personality clashes, lack of spiritual growth, backsliding, or pet-peaves. (1) Some leave because they see issues (real or imagined) which they disagree. (2) Others listen to wrong advisors, and of course, "Birds of a feather flock together." Also, "discontent breeds discontent" (Proverbs 6). (4) Still others leave because of family, friends, or hurt feelings.

WHY should a believer leave a Bible-believing, fundamental church? (1) You should leave if you are moving out of the area. (2) You should leave if doctrinal heresy enters the church which has been halted by following Matthew eighteen completely. (3) You should leave if there is proven immorality which will not be disciplined by the church (1 Corinthians 5). (4) You should leave if the church no longer practices New Testament Christianity (soul winning, baptism, adding to the church, exhortation, godly living (Acts 2:40-47). :thumb

candlelight

[IM4given]

#8 ??? an r-rated movie in a church??
#10 is quite interesting.....as a lot of churches use the screens today.

Anyway, how about members stirring up problems within the church? Do any of you have that problem in the church? Very disturbing!

It was a movie called "Phone Booth" and it was shown a young adults/singles Bible study group - in the church annex!

I don't mind reading from a screen once in awhile but when the entire service is 90 minutes of praise songs my neck gets tired. I want a Old Time Baptist Hymnal in my hand so I can sing two or three of my favorites and then sit back and hear some on-fire for God preaching going on! Give me an entire afternoon for the preaching of the Word and save the songs for the invitation!

[Evan57]

One family moved from awesome growing independent baptist church in northeast to the midwest area. We went to small independent baptist church that is kind of strict and not growing. Pastor preached. The family attended that church for six years then wife stopped attend this church. Seven months later, son stopped attend this church. That left daughter and man. He realized this is not the right church because pastor did not do what he asked for and greatly disappointed. Pastor preached is not new. We already know this and that. We learned some but not much. Also, he preached about tithe so much. That turned him off. What's more. Pastor does not allow any church members visit other independent baptist church in the same area except it is okay to visit other church that is far away. Only with his permission to allow visit other church in activities. He decided to leave this church to other independent baptist church that benefit God's words. Daughter loves other independent baptist church that is much better but it is smaller than previously. Ugh! It has personal evangelism and discipleship. However, the way presently pastor preaches and teaches is same as church from northeast.

So, pastors need to preach and teach that benefit God's words to them. Not to preach so much about money or offense them that make them leave. Also, he should not hold them to stay at his church. Pastor needs to let them go if it is not benefit to them.

[sadly, both wife and son refuse to check it out with the new independent baptist church.]

Evan57

[JerryNumbers]

It was a movie called "Phone Booth" and it was shown a young adults/singles Bible study group - in the church annex!

I don't mind reading from a screen once in awhile but when the entire service is 90 minutes of praise songs my neck gets tired. I want a Old Time Baptist Hymnal in my hand so I can sing two or three of my favorites and then sit back and hear some on-fire for God preaching going on! Give me an entire afternoon for the preaching of the Word and save the songs for the invitation!

But it seems now days many want to leave the invitation off.

I suppose they want the benediction to happen just as soon as the sermons ends.

I'm an old timer now, so my wisdom from my years of service and experience are not appreciated by some of the younger ones, but it would "SEEM" to me these who don't want an invitation after the sermon wants to insure that no convictions make them uncomfortable while they are in Jesus' Church House.

But I would be the 1st one to say, the invitation should not be long and drawn out if there is no response, but as long as there is responses it should keep going.

I've seen very few times in my years where the invitation was long and drawn out.

[Anon]

I thought the original intent of this thread was to talk about wrong reasons for people to leave church. Seems like its turning into a gripe session on why we have left churches in the past and for what ills.

My family has had to leave churches in the past...we've left alot of churches....but it isn't edifying to talk about pastors who visibly steal money from the offering plate....pastors who steal....pastors who get out of the ministry and divorce their wife...pastors whose kids were caught in the backseat of a car with a minor.... and more...all of which I've been in churches and experienced...but it doesn't really matter, does it? I'm currently in a church with a good pastor (haha) and serving God!

And the subject of the thread is pretty much "lame" reasons why people leave churches, which is the problem here.

[JerryNumbers]

I thought the original intent of this thread was to talk about wrong reasons for people to leave church. Seems like its turning into a gripe session on why we have left churches in the past and for what ills.

My family has had to leave churches in the past...we've left alot of churches....but it isn't edifying to talk about pastors who visibly steal money from the offering plate....pastors who steal....pastors who get out of the ministry and divorce their wife...pastors whose kids were caught in the backseat of a car with a minor.... and more...all of which I've been in churches and experienced...but it doesn't really matter, does it? I'm currently in a church with a good pastor (haha) and serving God!

And the subject of the thread is pretty much "lame" reasons why people leave churches, which is the problem here.

Besides that, some of it sounds like gossip, should gossip be on this board?

But I can say i know of a truth, I know of a person who thought the pastor offended a church member, but that was not what happened, the church member was the one in fault and he was trying to get the pastor run off by telling lies.

That is all I'm going to post on this topic, as I don't think its very edifying either with the direction it going.

[Guest Guest]

I thought the original intent of this thread was to talk about wrong reasons for people to leave church. Seems like its turning into a gripe session on why we have left churches in the past and for what ills.

My family has had to leave churches in the past...we've left alot of churches....but it isn't edifying to talk about pastors who visibly steal money from the offering plate....pastors who steal....pastors who get out of the ministry and divorce their wife...pastors whose kids were caught in the backseat of a car with a minor.... and more...all of which I've been in churches and experienced...but it doesn't really matter, does it? I'm currently in a church with a good pastor (haha) and serving God!

And the subject of the thread is pretty much "lame" reasons why people leave churches, which is the problem here.

I don't believe pastors ought to be made out to be perfect, especially when they are not. I don't think it's harmful to SOMETIMES talk about issues like this. Pastors aren't perfect, there are some bad ones, and that is just life. You say it isn't edifying because you'd rather people see any pastor as a superhuman. I've seen that so much in IFB circles.

By the way, I agree about the point of this thread though...it was for lame reasons why people leave.