I Want To Leave Home.

[CauliflowerClown]

The wierd thing about it is it seems it is legal in Michigan to use pot for medicine but illegal to posess it. Does that make you say "What?" does me.

[WellWithMySoul]

My heart goes out to you, and I've already lifted you up to our precious Lord in prayer.  You are in a very "lonely" place right now, and I know that it is

very difficult for you.  I sense that you desire to do what is right and what the Lord would have you to do.  Quite often even when the spirit is willing,

the flesh is weak...and so it can be difficult to "separate" feelings from what should be done.  Someone above quoted from Luke about praying for,

blessing, and loving one's enemies and those that "persecute you", and that is very wise counsel.  In Proverbs there are 3 verses that say there is

safety with a "multitude of counsellors".  We need to be wise with whom we choose to seek counsel, and so I am glad that you came to this site with

hopes that the Lord would work thru different ones here to offer counsel to you.  Isn't it wonderful how Jesus is also known as "Counsellor" (Is. 9:6),

and as His children we should be ever growing in "Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus"?  "But when he saw the multitudes, he

was moved with compassion on them, because they fainted, and were scattered abroad, as sheep having no shepherd" (Matt. 9:36).  Dear lady,

in your circumstances, you have no "under-shepherd" (Godly husband) to lead you in the way that you should go, and that can tempt you to be faint,

and perhaps "scattered" in your thinking....but praise God that Jesus is moved with compassion when one of His own is hurting.  Ooooh how He

loves you, and knows what is best for you.  Find time to go to the Word and be ready to "hear" Him responding to your prayers, pray for those

who are so troubling to you, and wait upon Him with a willing heart.  Along with these things....be thankful!  Thankful?  How can one be thankful in such trying

circumstances?  Be thankful to HIM for who He is, and for what He has done, and for what He is going to do....and be thankful that He has

allowed these very trying times with a plan and for a purpose!  These times are full of opportunity to not only grow in trusting the Lord, but also

opportunity to shine on and prove His indwelling presence!  It is opportunity to "prove the sincerity of your love", not only to the Saviour...but

also to your spouse!  These aren't easy things to do...but He knows your frame and longs to ease and lighten your burden and He will be

faithful. 

 

Please be encouraged in Him; He knows, He understands, and He loves you.     

[Salyan]

Y'all have oxygen tanks in your house and they're smoking in there?!? Yi, yi, yi...

[Rosie]

Laurie, what is it that you want us to tell you to do about this situation?

[CauliflowerClown]

It just feels like now I am say sin can abosolutely be in my house and I approve. As far as them defiling their bodies that's there choice forcing me to is not my choice. Smoke is smoke and if you are smoking in same area I am then I am breathing it too. I don't feel as tight as yesterday but my lungs should not feel tight at all in my home. I do want that big asthma attack that will have me wake in Jesus arms.  I am awake early I don't know why but I was in bedroom with door close sleeping and woke and the stench was strong. I pulled covers over my head and prayed andasked Jesus why does smoke have to come through closed doors. I tried to drift off the sleep but can't with covers over my head. Lift covers and stench is still very strong. I got up and asked is everyone in house smoking cause it is strong in my room. Bill smokes 2 -21/2 packs a day.  When they sat in gargage and smoke i would go out to talk to him but if he was smoking i didn't stay long. I could go in house now I feeling like leaving to get away from it. I juyst have no where to go and no $. If it was a nice sunny day my dog and i could at least go to the park. 

 

I living with it trying to be joyful but stench can cause me to leave.

[John81]

It just feels like now I am say sin can abosolutely be in my house and I approve. As far as them defiling their bodies that's there choice forcing me to is not my choice. Smoke is smoke and if you are smoking in same area I am then I am breathing it too. I don't feel as tight as yesterday but my lungs should not feel tight at all in my home. I do want that big asthma attack that will have me wake in Jesus arms.  I am awake early I don't know why but I was in bedroom with door close sleeping and woke and the stench was strong. I pulled covers over my head and prayed andasked Jesus why does smoke have to come through closed doors. I tried to drift off the sleep but can't with covers over my head. Lift covers and stench is still very strong. I got up and asked is everyone in house smoking cause it is strong in my room. Bill smokes 2 -21/2 packs a day.  When they sat in gargage and smoke i would go out to talk to him but if he was smoking i didn't stay long. I could go in house now I feeling like leaving to get away from it. I juyst have no where to go and no $. If it was a nice sunny day my dog and i could at least go to the park. 

 

I living with it trying to be joyful but stench can cause me to leave.

Your first duty is to OBey the Lord. Is your trial worse than what Jesus went through for you? Are you dealing with worse things than the Apostle Paul who called his many sufferings "light afflictions" compared to the what the Lord will give him for eternity?

 

As others have pointed out, you are to be a living example of Christ's love to your family regardless of their lifestyle. God never said this would always be easy, that we might not smell stench, we might not have to deal with life threatening situation, or that our families would always be easy to love and care for and they would ever be respectful of us.

 

We all have the same choice to make no matter what situation we are in, whether good or bad. Either we choose to OBey the Lord and follow Him or we choose to rebel and do what we determine is right in our own eyes. The choice is yours, all I can say is that OBeying and following Christ is always the right choice and rebelling and doing what we want is always the wrong choice.

[CauliflowerClown]

John put a clothes pin over your nose so you can not breathe though it. Now put a coffee stirrer straw in your mouth and get all your air through it. How active can you be? Is it fun? You get just enough air to remain alive but hardly enough to move from point A to point B. That is asthma. My asthama comes slowly and my bronicle tubes constrict. In times i have suffered for days on end I also pray and tell Jesus that he want our yea yea and our nay nay lukewarmness makes him sick and I'm to that point now give me enough air to breate and move or take it all away.  I was born with Hyline Membrane  Disease and my left lung was collasped. I was supposed to die but did not but have had asthma all my life. I had my last attack 6-7 years ago. I was told then that I also had COPD. I have to wear a scarf over my face if temps dip below 27 degrees. In summer when humidity level are high I am very short winded and can only move slow and I have to try to not over exert myself cause it mean trouble with my asthma a trip to hospital 10 day on steroids. Sometmes in summer if humidity is high I have to call into work cause I am not getting enough air to do my jOB. 

       

 Let me tell you something else do you know how many times I had to explaine why I did this or that was because bible says for wife to sumit and OBey their husband and then I am told  God did not call you to be a door mat. 

 

 There was other time i put my foot down and said no way not going to do it.  ( not to him but in my mind and I prayed for God to do something  just like I am doing now) That was when he wanted me to get an abortion. I would have aborted our only son.  Now this is my fear of having to go to hospital and be on steroids again and more lung function tests and then the drugs.  Not to mention more doctor bills.

 

 This remind me when I was bus captain and on Sunday morning I went to go pick up a 5 year old, shy girl that came on Sundays. I visited kids every Saturday too to see who would be coming on Sunday. This apprtment was alway smoky and had strong smell of smoke but that Sunday when I went to get her they invited me in like always and 4-5 adults were all smoking at the table while the little girl I went to get sat on the floor giving herself a breathing treatment.  Needless to say she wasn't going that Sunday cause her asthma flared up. I got to tell her maybe she could come next week and told her we would pray she feels better.  When I left it sicken me that they had a small child that had asthma and didn't have the brains to step outside on their balcony to smoke. I feel like that little girl no one cares. 

 

 There is nothing anyone can do here but if God really wanted me to stay around and breathe all the carcinogens and sacrifrice my health for the sake of my husband then why can't he a least make it smell better. Is this a join them if you can't beat them type of thing? I don't think so but I have to admitt that if i was a smoker myself it would not smell so bad.  

 

 I tried to find out the affects of pot on asthma and i kept finding sites pro weed saying pot was good for asthma. Really how can something with more carcinogens be good for asthma when tOBacco with less carcinogens are so bad for asthma? Don't sound right to me. Anyways I am living here I am breathing the second hand smoke and yes breathing difficulties are starting. I keep telling myself; so what, look how long it's been since your last one.  Even if I get hospitalized I'll be in a smokefree environment. So see I am also trying to encourage myself like David.   

 

     However I am also praying about selling some of my sick time at work.  This will be first time I ever did this. I am praying and asking before I fill out paper cause God knows whether I will need that time or not. God knows whether it would help or hender my taxes. Also I'm asking God if I can send it to IRS or one of the doctor bills, or can I go to Sam's Club and go hog wild in buying food.  Bible says not to be a surety for debt too.,  

 

 Elijah got depressed, Jeremiah was the crying Prophet I am not the only believer to feel so alone, and down. Oh a door mat is used to wipe dirt  off your shoes and they are dirty. I am breatheing second hand smoke and it is dirting my lungs so yes now I am a Door Mat.

[Salyan]

Easy there... You asked for advice and he was giving it, is all. I don't imagine anyone thinks this is easy for you.

[John81]

From a young age I had bronchial asthma and virtually everyone smoked back then.

 

As I pointed out, and Scripture points out, we aren't promised an easy existence, we aren't promised OBeying God will be the easy thing to do, we aren't promised that following Christ will keep us in a healthy place.

 

Yes indeed, various folks in the Bible went through some tough times. They had the same choice to make as you and I. Give up, rebel against God and pursue our own way, or OBey God, follow Him and trust Him with the outcome.

 

As Paul said, this life is a very temporary thing and whatever we face in this life is nothing compared to the greatness of what is to come.

 

Followers of Christ are called to sacrifice, give up all, for Him. That's a stark realty to millions of Christians around the world today, but to most of us in the West we have no real concept of surrendering all.

 

Again, it's up to you what you choose to do. You asked the question and you have received answers. The final thing comes down to whether you will choose to be OBedient to Christ regardless of personal cost, or will you choose to place personal matters ahead of the Lord. We all face that choice many times a day. Joshua had the best answer when he told the people that no matter what they chose to do, he was going to follow the Lord.

[Anon]

I don't think the Bible would be against her going to spend a week or two with a friend to rest her lungs and to give her husband a clue of what it would be like if he makes the house so miserable she gets sick to live in the house.

 

She can definitely in a loving way say "I love you, but I'm sick, and I need to go away for a couple of weeks to heal.   I wish you would not smoke in the house or at least would try to tone it down, because it makes me very sick.   I will be back in a couple of weeks."   Maybe he will miss her so much he will try to at least amend his behavior a little bit.

 

Divorce is OBviously not an answer, especially when he is sick like he is....but there are ways you can get a break for yourself or at least maybe try to come to some sort of compromise with him about his behavior.

[HappyChristian]

CC, I think Kitagirl hit the nail on the head.  Find a place to go for a few days and let your hubby know - lovingly.  And while you are letting your lungs rest, spend some extra time with the Lord to strengthen you for your return.

 

I am sorry that things are still so bad for you.  

[paid4]

If something illegal is going on in a house that is in your name you can be the one put in jail.

Illegal activity....call the law.

If your neighbor knows about drugs being used they would prOBably call the law. If you knew your neighbor was dealing with drugs you'd prOBably call the law on them.

Don't be sneaky about it just tell them all together at the same time that illegal drug use will not be tolerated in your house and that you will call the law if you see or smell it again.

You are called to be submissive to your husband....don't get me wrong.

If someone breaks into anyone's house on this forum don't think they're quoting "thou shalt not kill"  They are going to protect their family and themselves by whatever means that may be.

Be proactive. Be the one that goes after things for him and just don't bring the bad stuff back. If your kids are going and getting things remember they're supposed to be submissive to you as well.

My uncle had cancer and was on oxygen. He smoked as well. One night he fell asleep on the couch and when he woke up he lit a cigarette and the oxygen exploded. He was burnt internally from his lungs out to the tip of his lips. He never came home from the hospital after that.

 

You also have the responsibility to do what's right by your children as well. Don't let them play the pity card on you by having cancer. If it really worried or bothered them then they wouldn't be smoking. Some people use a traumatic thing like cancer as an excuse to do whatever they want to sometimes. I truly hope you find the right answer for what you're looking for. In all things seek to honor Christ and let that guide you.

 

P.S. try febreze. It's decent about removing smells. They also make special ashtrays that help reduce smell as well.

[Anon]

Air purifiers can help too....get one (a nice large one, Amazon has decent prices) and then put it in your room and keep the door closed at all times.  That way at least you can sleep okay.

[Alimantado]

So sorry this is happrning. Further to replies above, you might try fitting excluders to your bedroom door and maybe some other doors in the house to limit the spread of smoke--it sounds like what is getting to you most right now is that there's not a single room in the house where you can get away from it.

[Alimantado]

Also, going on what others' have said, I think there's a serious amount of mileage in saying that you're not trying to be mean but it's just too dangerous for him to smoke while he is using oxygen.