Putting the Children First

[heartstrings]

I was watching a video, the other night, in which a man, his wife, and child were attacked by a bear while on a camping trip. I thought it odd that all the guy could talk about was protecting his child; never once mentioned his wife. Then I'm reminded of my wife telling me when she learned about how her older parents, after the kids had all left home, got along great while alone, but got into conflict whenever the kids came for a visit. I wonder why? Then I've heard many times, spouses saying that "my kids come first". That sounds good, on the surface, but is it? Here is an article, by a psychologist, which sheds some light on this very crucial subject. (I hope it's Ok to post the link) 

https://www.theknot.com/content/choosing-between-child-and-spouse Here is a short excerpt...

Quote

In a marriage with children, it may seem counterintuitive to not put the kids first, says psychologist Yvonne Thomas. "However, it's actually healthier to make your spouse the first priority." This is because it benefits all of your family members. If you have an emotionally solid marriage with a good foundation, your children will feel happier, more stable and more secure, Thomas says.

But, this gem of wisdom is not new. 

Quote

 Titus 2:3 The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; 4That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,

Notice "hubby" is listed first? Why would the Bible say that young women, who typically say "I put my kids first", need to be  taught to love their children? I don't know for sure, But, from what I have seen, if spouses do not put each other first, there will be conflict in the home the children will not get the love they need and it's the kids who end up losing in the end.

[Salyan]

I think that is wise advice for relationships in the home. When it comes to a bear attack, I think it's quite right for adults to protect the children first. Other adults are presumably capable of removing themselves from teh situation (and frankly, no mother I know would leave without ensuring her child was safe anyways, so the dad could fight her to move her, or move the child and she'll come along. ) 

 

[Donut_brand_donuts]

I agree with your sentiment. The husband and wife are to become one flesh. They are the closest physical union on the earth. They cannot adequately love their kids if they do not adequately love each other first.

 

However given the nature of the bear attack I wouldn't hold it against the guy in this particular situation, for being so focused on saving his child. I don't have all the details but I imagine the wife was more capable of escape and the dad had to focus on rescuing the child.

[swathdiver]

A lot of things happen in tenths of a second that may take hours to articulate and not make it to print.  I'm sure he was concerned for them all.

[TheGloryLand]

I have a Christian Haitian friend, that told me during the earthquake in Haiti. He ran out of the house, leaving wife and children behind. I believe he loves them, but during a sudden emergency, we all will not act the same. Be Safe