Humor
Get Ready to ROFL! Join the Hilarity Brigade in Our Jokes & Humor Forum for Endless Laughter and Good Times!
949 topics in this forum
-
- 1 follower
- 0 replies
- 195 views
I'm NOT a fan of cats, though my wife and I have had around 50 of them in our life together.
Last reply by BrotherTony, -
- 1 follower
- 0 replies
- 192 views
A dentist was about to leave his office with his golf bag on his shoulder, when the phone rang. "Doctor," the caller said, "I have a terrible toothache. Can I stop by your office in a few minutes?" "Sorry," replied the dentist, "but I have a previous appointment to fill eighteen cavities this afternoon."
Last reply by BrotherTony, -
- 0 replies
- 546 views
Last reply by Razor, -
- 1 follower
- 0 replies
- 278 views
Last reply by BrotherTony, -
- 1 follower
- 1 reply
- 377 views
Last reply by SureWord, -
- 1 follower
- 0 replies
- 508 views
Last reply by BrotherTony, -
- 0 replies
- 226 views
Last reply by Razor, -
- 1 follower
- 0 replies
- 236 views
After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to the local grocery store. Unfortunately, like most men; I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter, from the local store manager: Dear Mrs. Harris: Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion, in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to, ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras: 1.…
Last reply by BrotherTony, -
- 1 follower
- 0 replies
- 285 views
Little Johnny is up a tree and won't come down. His mother pleads, "Johnny, please come down!" He won't. She calls the police, who order Johnny to descend in the name of the law, but to no avail. She calls the fire department. Johnny has now climbed even higher, out of reach of the firemen and refuses to come down. Finally in desperation she calls the local priest. He comes, looks up at Johnny in the tree, and without saying a word, he simply makes the sign of the cross. Johnny climbs hastily down the tree. His mother asks, "Johnny, why wouldn't you come down for me, or for the firemen, or for the police, but you came down for the priest?" …
Last reply by BrotherTony, -
- 1 follower
- 0 replies
- 245 views
Last reply by BrotherTony, -
- 0 replies
- 217 views
Last reply by Razor, -
- 1 follower
- 0 replies
- 312 views
A young seminary student went home for Christmas break. A horrible snowstorm stranded the regular minister in another town. The leaders of the congregation asked the young man to substitute for the regular minister. The young preacher started his sermon by explaining the meaning of a substitute. "If you break a window," he said, "and then place a piece of plywood over the hole -- that's a substitute." After the sermon, a well-intentioned woman wished to compliment the young man. As she enthusiastically shook his hand, she said: "You were no substitute. You were a real pane."
Last reply by BrotherTony, -
- 0 replies
- 158 views
Last reply by Razor, -
- 1 follower
- 0 replies
- 259 views
01/10/22 Grif.Net - 2-Line Odds & Ends I once read that in Alaska the men are men and so are the women. It also mentioned that if you’re a single woman there, your odds are good, but the goods are odd. ~~ "Sherlock, why is your front door painted yellow?" "A lemon entry, my dear Watson; a lemon entry.” ~~ I went to a theatrical performance on puns. Found out it was just another play on words. ~~ Every chicken coop must only have 2 doors. If it has 4 doors, it would be a chicken sedan. ~~ I have lots of jokes about unemployed people. None of them work. ~~ Two blind dudes are fighting viciou…
Last reply by BrotherTony, -
- 0 replies
- 288 views
Last reply by Razor, -
-
- Administrators
- 3 followers
- 26 replies
- 1.3k views
Last reply by TheGloryLand, -
-
- 1 follower
- 0 replies
- 193 views
Last reply by BrotherTony, -
- 1 follower
- 0 replies
- 255 views
Last reply by BrotherTony, -
- 0 replies
- 187 views
Last reply by Razor, -
- 2 followers
- 1 reply
- 222 views
Last reply by John Young, -
- 1 follower
- 0 replies
- 503 views
With the Ark safely settled, Noah opened the doors and commanded the animals, “Go forth and multiply“. All the animals left except for the two snakes. Again Noah commanded, “Go forth and multiply “. Again, the snakes didn’t move. Noah asks, “Why are you not leaving?” The snakes replied, “We can’t Noah, we’re adders.”
Last reply by BrotherTony, -
- 1 follower
- 0 replies
- 221 views
01/05/22 Grif.Net - Little-known Knights of the Round Table Some time back a humorist penned fictional “Knights” by tweaking real words or phrases. Brought smiles reading about the “largest knight of the round table’ (Sir Cumference) or the knight who enjoyed steak each day (Sir Loin of Beef). So, I’ve compiled some unfamiliar men who have joined the knighthood of humor. These include: Sir Real = the abstract artist Sir Vivor = the last knight standing on the island Sir Passer = the top-rated quarterback in his league Sir Fur = last seen riding the waves (also known as “the dude”) Sir Tax = the knight of bureaucracy, adding government fees to…
Last reply by BrotherTony, -
- 1 follower
- 2 replies
- 306 views
Last reply by Hugh_Flower, -
-
- Administrators
- 1 follower
- 5 replies
- 242 views
12/29/21 Grif.Net - Getting Older [25 years ago, I was a professor at Pillsbury College. Recall some fun discussions in the faculty bay where our offices were located.] Eating donuts that I had brought from the day-old counter at Wall Drug (I commuted 840 miles twice a month to be able to have a couple long weekends with the wife back in Wyoming and always tried to bring a treat back to campus), a few of us were discussing the trials of getting older. I admitted, "One time I caught myself with a jar of mayonnaise in my hand in front of the refrigerator and couldn't remember whether I was putting it away or starting to make a sandwich." I think it was D…
Last reply by Razor, -
-
- 1 follower
- 1 reply
- 281 views
Nothing is ever standardized.
Last reply by BrotherTony,