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Marrying a Couple


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I put this here for two reasons: (1) it's an independent Baptist church wedding (2) this forum is private.

I have a situation where a couple asked me to marry them and we've been friends for a long time. The thing is I know the couple is living in a worldly mindset such as cohabiting and alcohol, etc. They are also not members of my church. I was wondering if I can get some counsel on any similar situation you may have had... obviously I'm leaving out some details for privacy reasons. 

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First --- if I have reason to question the salvation of either party, I don't do the wedding (remember -- nothing in Scripture nor in Civil law states that a preacher [regardless of any position held] must perform weddings at all).

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I don't know, it seems by your posting that you have reservations about doing it.

We have a policy here - not written down, but known - that we only marry members of this church. At least one of them must be a member of this church, and the other must be a member of a likeminded IB church.

You could always instigate such a policy as a "non-offensive" way to decline?

Or if they are members of another church as you suggest, then talk it over with the other pastor, and let him know that you are uncomfortable, then let them know that you feel it would be wrong to overstep their pastor.

I remember my Pastor would not marry a couple until they had ceased from their sinful lifestyle. The guy had to move out of their home (they had kids too!) before he would agree to marry them. Here it takes 30 days at least to process the pre-wedding paperwork, so he was out of their bed for at least a month, and attending church regularly etc. If you want Bible for that, I am afraid that I can't give it to you, but it is your right to set some boundaries for them if they want you to do it.:15_1_63:

 

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Well, how about showing them their sins from the scriptures?  The fools make a mock of sin but the wise in heart will receive commandments.  I would also be blunt and tell them you do not marry fornicators and drunkards and how dare they defile what Christ died for, one of his New Testament Churches.  The church was established to the edification of the saints and to worship our Lord and Savior not for the heathens...  Sorry but that touched a nerve.

As a pastor, I don't think it wise to officiate the union of unrepentant sinners.  

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