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Remarriage


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My husband actually had to study this out because we have a very large number, like I said, of divorced and remarried in our church. At one point, one of our divorced men (although a good one...the divorce was a long time ago, and his second wife died of cancer, so he was currently a widower) was going to get remarried to a divorced woman. He held a position in the church, though not pastor or deacon. When they were about to get married, my husband had to study this out long and hard and came to the conclusion that basically, while the church will not sanction it and will not have any part in carrying it out....the Bible has no other restriction on a remarried divorced person other than pastor and deacon, and of course there are other consequences to deal with too that comes from that (troubled children, problem with ex's, etc) that are the natural consequences of sin.

There's no reason for a church to add MORE onto a divorced/remarried person than God does.

Oh...my dad also...he was a widower but married a divorced woman. He used to be a deacon. He knows full well he can never be that again. However he does teach Sunday School and is also a very effective financial and marriage counselor to many people in his church (he had a first successful marriage and his second marriage has been very successful as well, at least to him haha...she's my stepmom so I might be a tad biased the other way!)

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Suzy said what I think most hold to. The Word of God is clear with regards to divorce and remarriage and this is our standard, what all Christians should abide by. We seem to all agree with this.

The difference, if there is any, seems to be with regards to those Christians who have already violated the Word in these areas. Most here have put forth what Scripture says we (Christians) are to do when we realize we have sinned. First John addresses these matters (as does other areas of Scripture) and 1st John 1:9 is clear that all our sins can be forgiven and we can be cleansed of them.

You seem to be saying that those who have divorced and remarried another or have married a divorced person can't be forgiven of this sin and are unable to serve God. Is this what you are saying?


I am saying they are still in sin. I also said they can serve God but not as effective as a single or married can. I can tell you another thing a single christian cares for things of the Lord much better than a married. You should know this from 1 Corinthians 7. I never said they can't, serve the Lord. Read Hebrews look at all those mentioned who served God, Samson what good did he do? Yes he was a man of God. Or even Lot. What has failed to be seen. Is that remarriage unless the spouse is dead, is a lifestyle of sin. He is an eyeopener, probably starting the sameway as the whole divorce and/ or remarriage problem is this. Gay marriage, give it a few years and it too will be the norm in churches. Look how this problem is now with some other denominations. How about teen pregnancies or fornication amoung young christian adults. Used to not be that way right? Did not Paul warn the churches of leaven. Remember what he said "a little leaven leavens the whole lump."
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Biblically you cannot equate a second hetero marriage to gay marriage.

I somewhat think that New Testament divorce/remarriage is the equivalent of Old Testament polygamy. Not intended by God, but not the sin unto death, either. However, homosexuality has always been an abomination to God and always will be.

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I've hesitated to post this for a week or better...

Divorced people - plague!

Divorced people, yuck! They’re popping up everywhere these days. Oh my, we’ve even seen them in IFB and IB Churches! They create such a problem. You can’t fully use them in the ministries of your church, they’re so problematic. The nerve of them, they expect our good pastors to minister to them, they’re…sinners! They take the pastor’s time away from our other activities. Some of them have married again and so they are adulterers. Despicable cretins are what they are. Deliver us from this distasteful situation and remove them from our good IFB and IB Churches. After all, people may begin to talk. The next thing you know, others will accuse us of inviting in smokers, drinkers, prostitutes, and all manner of other sinners. Why can’t they go to some other church or form their own. Oh that’s right; they can’t form their own church because they can’t be pastors or deacons. Well something must be done with them, maybe the deacons can think of something. The Lord is getting a bad reputation because of these second class citizens attending our IFB Church. Some of us might even be accused of being sinners like them! Stoning is too good for them. Wouldn’t it be great if they would just go and leave us, our pastor, and IFB churches alone? Some of us wonder if they should be permitted to discuss spiritual matters among us or discuss Bible matters at all. Our children must be protected from them; they certainly should be closely monitored around the children. The nerve of some other churches to welcome them in with open arms; oh well, we knew the other churches were reprobate anyway. Now when Jesus had heard enough, he said to this group…

John 8:7-11
7 So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.
8 And again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground.
9 And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst.
10 When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?
11 She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.

How many divorced people are in your church?
What, you don’t know of any?
I wonder if they may feel a need to hide this detail from you.
I wonder why they never help with church activities.


11 She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee; go, and sin no more. What are the last words Jesus told her "go and sin no more."
What if she did commit adultery and never stopped after being told that? How about the man with her? Where was he? Jesus was looking at one woman with a multitude of supposed witnesses. Yet no man was caught in the act with her. Ever wonder why? There is a valuable teaching in forgiving others for sure. They brought her to a man they didn't even trust in, Jesus, kind of odd don't you think? This was another example of a pharasaical tempting Jesus had gone through during all of His ministry. Remember the Roman law? Who was king to those people? It is recorded in the gospels when Jesus was on trial. I don't condemn them, they can and do serve God.
Nevertheless, the Bible is clear on what they are known as if the spouse is still alive and they are married to another. Adultrer, adulteress, those are active words. Just as if you see a woman commit harlotry on the streets. Would you say today she is a harlot but tomorrow while she still on the street she isn't? Paul also says those in the world who do such thing we are to go to, right? What does Paul say to those,within the body of Christ, who do such things? It doesn't matter what sin he is talking about, the list is in there. The works of flesh are what? Where do we draw the line?

Also, when someone repents from a sin they turn away from the sin and towards God. If someone is still in the same sin after repentance, it is not true repentance. Am I wrong? Again, the Bible says that a spouse is bound by the law of marriage as long as the other spouse is a live. This bond of marriage does not cease to exist just because the divorced spouse marries another. Do you agree that the Bible says this? I know it is hard to stomach since there are so many divorced people. It is easier to deny what the Bible says sometimes instead of confronting such a prominent sin.

On another note. You honestly do not know me personally and are making judgments towards me. Divorced people are not ran out of the church I attend. We are just a small church, and I don't believe anyone has been divorced and remarried in it. My eldest sister married a divorced man, her husband still has resentment towards several preachers who would not preform their wedding vows. She still is my sister and I still love her regardless and still have a good relationship with her. My other sister was on the verge of divorce and thank God she saw how bad it is and is still married to her husband, It is amazing what christian brothers and sisters can accomplish if they are bold enough to tell others the truth. My best friend has been married twice and was engaged 5 times, He now believes what the Bibles says and agrees with it and even confesses he was in sin in that second marriage and it was not of God. He is grounded on his stance that he will never marry unless he is free to marry according to Scripture.
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Biblically you cannot equate a second hetero marriage to gay marriage.

I somewhat think that New Testament divorce/remarriage is the equivalent of Old Testament polygamy. Not intended by God, but not the sin unto death, either. However, homosexuality has always been an abomination to God and always will be.


Are you saying you can't be homosexual and saved?
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Are you saying you can't be homosexual and saved?


The Bible teaches that anyone who is in blatant, unrepentant sin is probably not saved (not that they lost it, but that they probably never had it to begin with). Of course that is for God to judge.

How does one repent of a remarriage? Get another divorce, which is another sin?

You see, it is two different things altogether.

Abraham lay with his handmaiden....God didn't like that...and Abraham dealt with the consequences as every generation since has dealt with it. (Middle East problems). However God still used him and loved him and forgave him. BUT if Abraham had gone out and lay with a man...he would have been struck dead.
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11 She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee; go, and sin no more. What are the last words Jesus told her "go and sin no more."
What if she did commit adultery and never stopped after being told that? How about the man with her? Where was he? Jesus was looking at one woman with a multitude of supposed witnesses. Yet no man was caught in the act with her. John 8:4 They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act. Ever wonder why? There is a valuable teaching in forgiving others for sure. They brought her to a man they didn't even trust in, Jesus, kind of odd don't you think? This was another example of a pharasaical tempting Jesus had gone through during all of His ministry. Remember the Roman law? Who was king to those people? It is recorded in the gospels when Jesus was on trial. I don't condemn them, they can and do serve God.
Nevertheless, the Bible is clear on what they are known as if the spouse is still alive and they are married to another. Adultrer, adulteress, those are active words. Just as if you see a woman commit harlotry on the streets. Would you say today she is a harlot but tomorrow while she still on the street she isn't? Paul also says those in the world who do such thing we are to go to, right? What does Paul say to those,within the body of Christ, who do such things? It doesn't matter what sin he is talking about, the list is in there. The works of flesh are what? Where do we draw the line?
We do not draw the line and I thank my Savior that He appointed NONE OF US to do that.
Also, when someone repents from a sin they turn away from the sin and towards God. If someone is still in the same sin after repentance, it is not true repentance. Am I wrong? Again, the Bible says that a spouse is bound by the law of marriage as long as the other spouse is a live. This bond of marriage does not cease to exist just because the divorced spouse marries another. Do you agree that the Bible says this? I know it is hard to stomach since there are so many divorced people. It is easier to deny what the Bible says sometimes instead of confronting such a prominent sin.

On another note. You honestly do not know me personally and are making judgments towards me. You may feel some judgement, it isn't from anyone here, don't take personally words painted with a wide brush; also, don't attempt to read yourself into every word here, its not about you. Divorced people are not ran out of the church I attend. We are just a small church, and I don't believe anyone has been divorced and remarried in it. My eldest sister married a divorced man, her husband still has resentment towards several preachers who would not preform their wedding vows. She still is my sister and I still love her regardless and still have a good relationship with her. My other sister was on the verge of divorce and thank God she saw how bad it is and is still married to her husband, It is amazing what christian brothers and sisters can accomplish if they are bold enough to tell others the truth. My best friend has been married twice and was engaged 5 times, He now believes what the Bibles says and agrees with it and even confesses he was in sin in that second marriage and it was not of God. He is grounded on his stance that he will never marry unless he is free to marry according to Scripture.


I'm not going to argue with you whether divorce/remarriage is sin or not. I've said it is sin and sin is forgiveable. Otherwise, there would have to be a denial of the all sufficiency of Christ's blood; I would not do that. In the case of Dick and Jane I presented here, there can be NO reconciliation. When Dick and Jane come to their senses and obey the N.T. scripture and repent and lay this sin at the cross, "it is finished." They can forgive one another for their sin toward one another but, they cannot divorce again. It is dangerous to assume, a form of judgement which is sin, take caution.
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Thank you, 1Tim115. I am one of those terrible divorced women. I have actually been divorced twice. Adultery, on his part, both times. Both of them claimed to be Christians. I know, shocking!! I also know that unless they die, I will not be able to marry again. I get it, I really do. That's OK. I am thankful that my little IFB church doesn't see me as useless. They know that God even forgives divorced people, and He even can use them! Praise God always!! :clapping:
Linda

Edited by busdrvrlinda54
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Thank you, 1Tim115. I am one of those terrible divorced women. I have actually been divorced twice. Adultery, on his part, both times. Both of them claimed to be Christians. I know, shocking!! I also know that unless they die, I will not be able to marry again. I get it, I really do. That's OK. I am thankful that my little IFB church doesn't see me as useless. They know that God even forgives divorced people, and He even can use them! Praise God always!! :clapping:
Linda


You are doing the right thing, It isn't about the divorce for probable cause, such as yourself. It is the whole remarriage thing. The bible says to stay unmarried or reconcile back to that husband or until he is dead you can then marry another. Like I said before an unmarried christian cares for things of the Lord more than a married christian. Paul explains it in 1 Corinthians chapters 7. I never said divorced people are useless. My best friend is very effective in his church. Edited by Kleptes
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I'm not going to argue with you whether divorce/remarriage is sin or not. I've said it is sin and sin is forgiveable. Otherwise, there would have to be a denial of the all sufficiency of Christ's blood; I would not do that. In the case of Dick and Jane I presented here, there can be NO reconciliation. When Dick and Jane come to their senses and obey the N.T. scripture and repent and lay this sin at the cross, "it is finished." They can forgive one another for their sin toward one another but, they cannot divorce again. It is dangerous to assume, a form of judgement which is sin, take caution.


The difference is that I believe that God doesn't recognize that second marriage as a covenant and they are living in sin just as two people who live together. How about the common-marriage law. Do you agree with that? Divorce is one thing. The choices you make after the divorce is what matters.


You may feel some judgement, it isn't from anyone here, don't take personally words painted with a wide brush; also, don't attempt to read yourself into every word here, its not about you.


How many divorced people are in your church?
What, you don’t know of any?
I wonder if they may feel a need to hide this detail from you.
I wonder why they never help with church activities.


That reeks of sarcasm, and that is a judgment towards me. Edited by Kleptes
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The difference is that I believe that God doesn't recognize that second marriage as a covenant and they are living in sin just as two people who live together. How about the common-marriage law. Do you agree with that? Divorce is one thing. The choices you make after the divorce is what matters.


Then why did Jesus recognize each of the Samaritan woman's five husbands? She could not have been a widow five times or Jesus would not have pointed it out as sinful.
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Then why did Jesus recognize each of the Samaritan woman's five husbands? She could not have been a widow five times or Jesus would not have pointed it out as sinful.


I replied to the samaritan woman already. In an that same post. Being under Moses' precept. Edited by Kleptes
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The difference is that I believe that God doesn't recognize that second marriage as a covenant and they are living in sin just as two people who live together. How about the common-marriage law. Do you agree with that? Divorce is one thing. The choices you make after the divorce is what matters.






That reeks of sarcasm, and that is a judgment towards me.


I'm sorry you take it that way, there is no need. I'll keep believing what I do and you keep your belief.
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I'm sorry you take it that way, there is no need. I'll keep believing what I do and you keep your belief.


I will agree to disagree as well. It is ok, things happen. This topic can be and is a heated topic. Edited by Kleptes
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The sticking point seems to be whether divorced and then remarried couples are living in sin or not.

If they have not confessed their sin and been forgiven, per 1 John 1:9, then they are living in sin. If they have followed 1 John 1:9 then they are not living in sin. If even after following 1 John 1:9 they were still living in sin then that would mean such a sin would be unforgivable and Chris's blood wouldn't wash away the sin.

God has made provision for all our sins for He knows our sin nature and our weak flesh. God recognizes these marriages which were begun in sin just as he recognizes other marriages that were begun in sin. God provides the same means for forgiveness for this sin as He does others.

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