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Remarriage


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One thing to note is that when Jesus spoke to the Samaritan woman, he recognized each of her five husbands as "husbands". So that sounds to me like five counts of adultery...and then a living in fornication with the one that was not her husband.

Also if I were to run off on my husband for ONE night.....I could be considered an "adulteress" because I committed adultery. However I can repent from that sin and be forgiven. Soooo if someone gets remarried, they are an "adulterer" or "adulteress" but they can still renew their relationship with God and be used of Him. Also, after the next marriage, God evidently recognizes that marriage per the Samaritan woman, and so you need to just stay in that new marriage, without becoming an "adulterer" a second (or third, etc) time. If it were perpetual sin, God would want the new "adulterous" marriage to dissolve...but He never teaches that...He teaches to remain in the marriage you are in...which means it cannot possibly be living in constant sin.


Those are fair points. The only thing I can think of that might favor the idea of "perpetual" sin is what John told Herod.

"Mark 6:17-18 For Herod himself had sent forth and laid hold upon John, and bound him in prison for Herodias sake, his brother Philip's wife: for he had married her. For John had said unto Herod, It is not lawful for thee to have thy brother's wife."

I suppose there is a chance John only told him this before he married her, but if that was the case and this wasn't a case of continued sin I don't know why herodias would want to have John killed for it. I can see points for both sides on this issue but I don't see such strong evidence for it being perpetual sin to encourage those who have been remarried after divorce split up.
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Add to the mix that God told people that a woman who married a second husband was not to return to the first if the second marriage didn't work out. I realize we are not under the law, but God's principles don't change. Once a second marriage takes place, the first marriage is not to be considered still viable.

You are correct Gods principles do not change. I urge you to reread Matthew 19:3-9. Jesus is God correct? Jesus said from the beginning it was not so. Because He was asked a question on why Moses (a man) then command them a bill of divorcement. Jesus' reply was because of the hardness of thier hearts. Gods priniciple from the beginning was not to put away a wife at all. But for the two to be one flesh. Jesus' initial statement "What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." reinforced with what he said later. Which I already meantioned. There is no second marriage approved by God unless a death of a spouse has happened. Period! I am surprised at the response by some IFBs. If this question had come up 20 or so years ago. It would have been a resounding "NO!" by most. The F in IFB means Fundmamental. Marriage to one spouse is a fundamental teaching. Jesus thought so. Edited by Kleptes
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I don't think the question is whether or not God wants a divorced person remarried. I think most of us agree it is NOT right.

However, its the "norm" today. Unfortunately. I think the main question is, are these people placed on a shelf to do nothing for God for the rest of their lives, because they are living in constant sin until death? I think most of us would say, "No...God can and still does use these people."

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I don't think the question is whether or not God wants a divorced person remarried. I think most of us agree it is NOT right.

However, its the "norm" today. Unfortunately. I think the main question is, are these people placed on a shelf to do nothing for God for the rest of their lives, because they are living in constant sin until death? I think most of us would say, "No...God can and still does use these people."


Can a fornicator,or a thief, or a liar,or an idolator? They can too but very little. Thier sin will catch up to them. On the other hand a divorced remarried couple will not be as effectivley as one that is either single, or remaines married would. People do a lot of good works for the Lord. It is the whole christian life we are to live that is seen. I work with non christian women. Do you realize that they see the divorced and/ or remarried christian as a negative. We aren't supposed to do that. It is like the old addage of what people say about some christians. "Live like the devil through out the week and become a saint on Sunday." In thier eyes it is the same concept. Sadly some of them have been divorced and remarried themselves. Ever hear anyoine say the Church is full of hipocrites. Look at the children in those houses, statistics show that they too will have the probablilty to divorce at some point in thier lives too. Some will say "well if they are faithful to the Lord they won't. Were not thier parents christians and faithful to the Lord as well? Someone pointed out in a post that even God gave Israel a bill of divorcement. That is very true, but I have yet fo find the verse were he married another. Is not Israel still His? Jesus Christ has the Church as bride to be. Do you think he to will put us away and marry another? God does have principles. Edited by Kleptes
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Can a fornicator,or a thief, or a liar,or an idolator? They can too but very little. Thier sin will catch up to them. On the other hand a divorced remarried couple will not be as effectivley as one that is either single, or remaines married would. People do a lot of good works for the Lord. It is the whole christian life we are to live that is seen. I work with non christian women. Do you realize that they see the divorced and/ or remarried christian as a negative. We aren't supposed to do that. It is like the old addage of what people say about some christians. "Live like the devil through out the week and become a saint on Sunday." In thier eyes it is the same concept. Sadly some of them have been divorced and remarried themselves. Ever hear anyoine say the Church is full of hipocrites. Look at the children in those houses, statistics show that they too will have the probablilty to divorce at some point in thier lives too. Some will say "well if they are faithful to the Lord they won't. Were not thier parents christians and faithful to the Lord as well? Someone pointed out in a post that even God gave Israel a bill of divorcement. That is very true, but I have yet fo find the verse were he married another. Is not Israel still His? Jesus Christ has the Church as bride to be. Do you think he to will put us away and marry another? God does have principles.

Suzy said what I think most hold to. The Word of God is clear with regards to divorce and remarriage and this is our standard, what all Christians should abide by. We seem to all agree with this.

The difference, if there is any, seems to be with regards to those Christians who have already violated the Word in these areas. Most here have put forth what Scripture says we (Christians) are to do when we realize we have sinned. First John addresses these matters (as does other areas of Scripture) and 1st John 1:9 is clear that all our sins can be forgiven and we can be cleansed of them.

You seem to be saying that those who have divorced and remarried another or have married a divorced person can't be forgiven of this sin and are unable to serve God. Is this what you are saying?
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My husband teaches that God's Word has worked in the punishment for divorced people in His Word already...you can never be a Pastor or a Deacon as long as you live. That is your punishment. Any other restrictions are man-made. If God wants to use a divorced person in other capacities, who are we to tell Him that the divorced person is too sinful for Him to use?

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My husband teaches that God's Word has worked in the punishment for divorced people in His Word already...you can never be a Pastor or a Deacon as long as you live. That is your punishment. Any other restrictions are man-made. If God wants to use a divorced person in other capacities, who are we to tell Him that the divorced person is too sinful for Him to use?

Like all sins, there are consequences, but also like all sins, we can be forgiven and still follow Christ. Anyone who has confessed their sins and set their heart to follow Christ can be of service to Him in some way.
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I've hesitated to post this for a week or better...

Divorced people - plague!

Divorced people, yuck! They’re popping up everywhere these days. Oh my, we’ve even seen them in IFB and IB Churches! They create such a problem. You can’t fully use them in the ministries of your church, they’re so problematic. The nerve of them, they expect our good pastors to minister to them, they’re…sinners! They take the pastor’s time away from our other activities. Some of them have married again and so they are adulterers. Despicable cretins are what they are. Deliver us from this distasteful situation and remove them from our good IFB and IB Churches. After all, people may begin to talk. The next thing you know, others will accuse us of inviting in smokers, drinkers, prostitutes, and all manner of other sinners. Why can’t they go to some other church or form their own. Oh that’s right; they can’t form their own church because they can’t be pastors or deacons. Well something must be done with them, maybe the deacons can think of something. The Lord is getting a bad reputation because of these second class citizens attending our IFB Church. Some of us might even be accused of being sinners like them! Stoning is too good for them. Wouldn’t it be great if they would just go and leave us, our pastor, and IFB churches alone? Some of us wonder if they should be permitted to discuss spiritual matters among us or discuss Bible matters at all. Our children must be protected from them; they certainly should be closely monitored around the children. The nerve of some other churches to welcome them in with open arms; oh well, we knew the other churches were reprobate anyway. Now when Jesus had heard enough, he said to this group…

John 8:7-11
7 So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.
8 And again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground.
9 And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst.
10 When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?
11 She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.

How many divorced people are in your church?
What, you don’t know of any?
I wonder if they may feel a need to hide this detail from you.
I wonder why they never help with church activities.

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I've hesitated to post this for a week or better...

Divorced people - plague!

Divorced people, yuck! They’re popping up everywhere these days. Oh my, we’ve even seen them in IFB and IB Churches! They create such a problem. You can’t fully use them in the ministries of your church, they’re so problematic. The nerve of them, they expect our good pastors to minister to them, they’re…sinners! They take the pastor’s time away from our other activities. Some of them have married again and so they are adulterers. Despicable cretins are what they are. Deliver us from this distasteful situation and remove them from our good IFB and IB Churches. After all, people may begin to talk. The next thing you know, others will accuse us of inviting in smokers, drinkers, prostitutes, and all manner of other sinners. Why can’t they go to some other church or form their own. Oh that’s right; they can’t form their own church because they can’t be pastors or deacons. Well something must be done with them, maybe the deacons can think of something. The Lord is getting a bad reputation because of these second class citizens attending our IFB Church. Some of us might even be accused of being sinners like them! Stoning is too good for them. Wouldn’t it be great if they would just go and leave us, our pastor, and IFB churches alone? Some of us wonder if they should be permitted to discuss spiritual matters among us or discuss Bible matters at all. Our children must be protected from them; they certainly should be closely monitored around the children. The nerve of some other churches to welcome them in with open arms; oh well, we knew the other churches were reprobate anyway. Now when Jesus had heard enough, he said to this group…

John 8:7-11
7 So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.
8 And again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground.
9 And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst.
10 When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?
11 She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.

How many divorced people are in your church?
What, you don’t know of any?
I wonder if they may feel a need to hide this detail from you.
I wonder why they never help with church activities.

I know of a few churches like this. :icon_sad:

One lady was seriously hurt because of such, with added hypocrisy on top. Her husband was cheating on her and she took steps to confront this with him to no avail. She eventually sought the help of the pastor. Still no help. Finally her husband divorced her and took up with the other woman. The former wife was then shunned by the church while her ex-husband was not. He was a businessman who made large donations to the church.

I've seen in other cases where divorce occurs and at least one former spouse is treated terribly by the church. Most often it seems to be the woman who is most ill treated.

We are called to love one another and bear one anothers burdens.
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We have so many divorced people in our church that its one of the reasons we don't yet have deacons. (Its okay...we have a small church...Biblically, we don't really need deacons. The men of the church get together to make church decisions instead, in our church). But we are happy to say they are free to serve in any other way they feel led. We don't have any Biblical basis to prove otherwise.

My husband will not preach the wedding of a divorced person, nor will we have a bridal shower for the wedding of a divorced person...but since God doesn't tell us to otherwise limit the service of a divorced person, we don't limit that.

My husband does preach about it occasionally to try to catch the younger generation before they make the same mistakes but assures the divorced people that God can still use them.

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We have so many divorced people in our church that its one of the reasons we don't yet have deacons. (Its okay...we have a small church...Biblically, we don't really need deacons. The men of the church get together to make church decisions instead, in our church). But we are happy to say they are free to serve in any other way they feel led. We don't have any Biblical basis to prove otherwise.

My husband will not preach the wedding of a divorced person, nor will we have a bridal shower for the wedding of a divorced person...but since God doesn't tell us to otherwise limit the service of a divorced person, we don't limit that.

My husband does preach about it occasionally to try to catch the younger generation before they make the same mistakes but assures the divorced people that God can still use them.

It is so wonderful to hear this, Kitagrl. So few pastors stand firm on this issue. Too many acquiesce to the appalling promiscuity and divorce even among churches. It is good to hear that some pastors are still holding firm for holiness.
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Just to be sure there is no doubt, some of you may know my pastor...

My pastor has and does preach against divorce and remarriage of divorced.
My pastor will not marry the divorced.
Our church has a requirement of one wife (lifetime) for pastors and deacons.
We preach it is sin and forgivable.

My Pastor preaches we are to love the divorced/remarried as brothers and sisters in the Lord.
We encourage them to take part in Biblical authorized ministries.

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We have so many divorced people in our church that its one of the reasons we don't yet have deacons. (Its okay...we have a small church...Biblically, we don't really need deacons. The men of the church get together to make church decisions instead, in our church). But we are happy to say they are free to serve in any other way they feel led. We don't have any Biblical basis to prove otherwise.

My husband will not preach the wedding of a divorced person, nor will we have a bridal shower for the wedding of a divorced person...but since God doesn't tell us to otherwise limit the service of a divorced person, we don't limit that.

My husband does preach about it occasionally to try to catch the younger generation before they make the same mistakes but assures the divorced people that God can still use them.

:amen:
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Just to be sure there is no doubt, some of you may know my pastor...

My pastor has and does preach against divorce and remarriage of divorced.
My pastor will not marry the divorced.
Our church has a requirement of one wife (lifetime) for pastors and deacons.
We preach it is sin and forgivable.

My Pastor preaches we are to love the divorced/remarried as brothers and sisters in the Lord.
We encourage them to take part in Biblical authorized ministries.

While all this is important, I believe the last two sentences are an often overlooked, or even rejected, key.
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