Jump to content
  • Welcome Guest

    For an ad free experience on Online Baptist, Please login or register for free

Stealing members


Recommended Posts

  • Members

I'm not saying the new pastor has to mediate the reconciliation, but he can refuse to allow the prospective member to join until all reasonable efforts to resolve the issue have been made. And if the prospective member is in the wrong and joins the new church, what's to say that unresolved issue won't rear its ugly head at the new church? Should the disgruntled member participate at the Lord's table when he/she has unresolved issues with a former church?

If the former pastor is wrong, the member as least should explain to the former pastor why he/she is leaving. Many church members leave without explanation, and the pastor doesn't realize what the issue is until much later. I think the new pastor has the responsibility to investigate why someone left a church to join the new church. If there are unresolved issues, then those need to be addressed, or the new church is enabling a grumbler.

Too many churches accept new members without questioning. Maybe churches should treat prospective members as new employees, with background checks, drug tests, etc. (Maybe drug tests are taking it a little far.) :saint2:


Amen, Brother! Excellent post!
BTW, my answer to your question about the LORD's Supper, is, a resounding NO!
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Why anyone in their right mind would steal a member from another good church is beyond me. The only way they can be stolen is if they are disgruntled. If they are disgruntled with the other church, how long before they are equally disgruntled with my church. Disguntled members are usually problem members and add nothing to the church that steals them but problems.

A member who can be stollen from another church can just as easily be stolen. All the stealer does is encourage disgruntled members of another church to become a disgruntled members of his church. This just encourages church hopping.

If a person comes to a church because of dissatisfaction with his old church, what has he done to rectify it. Has he been to the pastor with his complaint. If not, I don't need him.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Its not that difficulty for the smooth talkers. They just stay after the person as opportunities are made telling them how much better it would be for them and family if they would come and worship with them. There be some who has it down to a science, they can make a happy church member into a disgruntled church member planting the right words.



Just as the associate pastor said to me a couple of years back, "Y'all ought to close your church down and come join us so that we can be one as Jesus prayed for us to be."

The church he is associate pastor of, they will join together with anyone who will join with them no matter what teachings they hold to. It seems they believe in tolerance, acceptance, and a false unity. They will let most anyone who claims to be a pastor stand behind their pulpit, no matter what church they're affiliated with.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Its not that difficulty for the smooth talkers. They just stay after the person as opportunities are made telling them how much better it would be for them and family if they would come and worship with them. There be some who has it down to a science, they can make a happy church member into a disgruntled church member planting the right words.



Just as the associate pastor said to me a couple of years back, "Y'all ought to close your church down and come join us so that we can be one as Jesus prayed for us to be."

The church he is associate pastor of, they will join together with anyone who will join with them no matter what teachings they hold to. It seems they believe in tolerance, acceptance, and a false unity. They will let most anyone who claims to be a pastor stand behind their pulpit, no matter what church they're affiliated with.


You're exactly right!
That "church" will be here, after we're gone!
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

I always thought that a person usually had a visit with the pastor of a church before joining. I assume that any issues would be dealt with before that person ever actually publicly joins the church. Any problems that person had in a previous church, he is probably bringing it right with him, and there is the potential for problems in his new church because of it.

Anyways, I have also been of the opinion that a person often has already left a church in his heart and mind long before the actual break. He is looking for excuses to leave and it won't take much.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 6 months later...
  • Moderators

Canadian churches aren't immune from such things (especially in the bigger cities, where there might be 2-3 good churches within driving distance), but it sure helps that in most of the West the churches are a good hour to three hours apart - sometimes more like 5 or 6! That's an awfully long way to drive...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 8 months later...
  • Members



The pastor of XYZ also needs to talk with the pastor of ABC and see why one of ABC's members is visiting XYZ, in the first place!



Shouldn't what we do, especially if we are are a pastor, be biblical and set a biblical example for others? Is calling the other pastor to talk ABOUT his former member the right thing to do? Unless said member was truly a troublemaker like "Alexander the Coppersmith", wouldn't that be talebearing? If you are the "pastor of ABC": what are you going to say about it if "member Jones" tells his side of the story to pastor XYZ? And if pastor ABC does tell his version of whatever the issues are/were, how is his version going to affect pastor XYZ's impression or judgement of member Jones?
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

We have got off subject, this was about churches stealing members.

I always ask anyone I am talking with if they are a member of a church, if so, & they are out of church, I advice them to go back to their home church. Some don't do that, they will do everything they can to get that person to their church. In fact one pastor scolded me quite bad for saying that, telling me never to advise someone out of church to go back to their home church. Try to get them to come to our church. Its quite wrong to do such a thing & I refuse to.

And of course you will have people that get mad over something, some will drop out of church, others will look for another church, that has nothing to do with stealing members.

And to you will have those who have done something wrong & are ashamed to go back to their home church, some of them will seek another church, but that is not stealing church members.

Stealing church members is when a member of another church, even the pastor, goes after a person that they know is a member of a sister church, trying their best to get that person, even a whole family to switch to their church. And it happens, for some that is the only way they know to gain members.

And of course if a member of another church wants to join your church by letter, you are to send a letter to the other church asking them about this person, that is if they would recommend them. Of course that is for churches you would take a letter from, there be many that we would not accept a letter from.

And of course we can take them by statement, if their statement sounds right, that is not stealing church members.

And of course by confession of faith & baptizing.

I do know of & occasion where a man got divorced, went to another church applying for membership while shacked up with a woman that was not his wife & they readily accepted him by statement without a single question after he told them there was a problem at the other church & they might not recommend him.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

OK, I do recall one complaint written about one "Alexander the Coppersmith" giving Paul trouble. But suppose the church leader happens to be one of those "wolves in sheep's clothing" or a "Lord over God's heritage" at best. who has truly manipulated, abused and even lied on the leaving member; is his "letter" going to be beneficial to anyone?


Jeremiah 23:1Woe be unto the pastors that destroy and scatter the sheep of my pasture! saith the LORD.
2Therefore thus saith the LORD God of Israel against the pastors that feed my people; Ye have scattered my flock, and driven them away, and have not visited them: behold, I will visit upon you the evil of your doings, saith the LORD.
3And I will gather the remnant of my flock out of all countries whither I have driven them, and will bring them again to their folds; and they shall be fruitful and increase.
4And I will set up shepherds over them which shall feed them: and they shall fear no more, nor be dismayed, neither shall they be lacking, saith the LORD.

Read also Ezekiel 34 which tells more about some of those wicked "shepherds" and even some of the MEMBERS one might find in an abusive situation.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

OK, I do recall one complaint written about one "Alexander the Coppersmith" giving Paul trouble. But suppose the church leader happens to be one of those "wolves in sheep's clothing" or a "Lord over God's heritage" at best. who has truly manipulated, abused and even lied on the leaving member; is his "letter" going to be beneficial to anyone?


Jeremiah 23:1Woe be unto the pastors that destroy and scatter the sheep of my pasture! saith the LORD.
2Therefore thus saith the LORD God of Israel against the pastors that feed my people; Ye have scattered my flock, and driven them away, and have not visited them: behold, I will visit upon you the evil of your doings, saith the LORD.
3And I will gather the remnant of my flock out of all countries whither I have driven them, and will bring them again to their folds; and they shall be fruitful and increase.
4And I will set up shepherds over them which shall feed them: and they shall fear no more, nor be dismayed, neither shall they be lacking, saith the LORD.

Read also Ezekiel 34 which tells more about some of those wicked "shepherds" and even some of the MEMBERS one might find in an abusive situation.

3 John 9 is perhaps a good example to consider.

Also, recall other epistles where specific Christians are mentioned in the letter to a church regarding their standing in Christ.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members
...I advice them to go back to their home church. Some don't do that, they will do everything they can to get that person to their church. In fact one pastor scolded me quite bad for saying that, telling me never to advise someone out of church to go back to their home church. Try to get them to come to our church. Its quite wrong to do such a thing & I refuse to.


This example too will help keep the church pure. Busybody and tattlers are a real problem, if they couldn't get along in their previous churches it's only a matter of time before they start trouble in yours. As part of the doctrine of sanctification they must learn to get along with others, mind their own business and control their tongue. Allowing them to hop from church to church only perpetuates the problem and creates un-necessary strife for everyone else.

As learned from Pator M.L. Moser and the Baptist Challenge, those members must make things right with their old church and pastor before one even considers accepting them into their flock. And really, if they've made things right, then they should stay. Church membership is not a fickle matter; it requires the assistance of the Holy Spirit and fervent prayer. I "wasted" my first 3 years after salvation by choosing churches based on my own wisdom rather than seeking the Lord's.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

........Of course that is for churches you would take a letter from, there be many that we would not accept a letter from.



Some of you seem to be assuming (and I'm not saying it is you, Jerry) that it is always the member who was in the wrong for leaving....
Jerry admits that some churches, by his estimation, aren't suitable even for him to accept a letter from. There is such a thing as "controlling" churches who manipulate their members, Just because it has a steeple, don't mean it's good for people. Hey I just made that up.... :icon_rolleyes:
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Yes, just because a church calls itself following Christ, does not mean its following Christ, you have to compare it to the Bible, if it does not pass the test, them I will have nothing to do with them.

We are warned about such things many times throughout the Bible.

And no, its not always the one that leaves a church that is in the wrong, & a person can be in such a church them realize that God tells them to come out from among them.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.



×
×
  • Create New...