Members futurehope Posted January 4, 2009 Members Share Posted January 4, 2009 I agree. What I meant about the girls is that they don't start out learning to respect dad from mom so much as they start out loving dad and just trusting in his arms. Later in life, they tend to build stronger relationships with mom and start learning how to be a woman and a wife. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members blossom Posted January 4, 2009 Members Share Posted January 4, 2009 That's very interesting. I have never thought of my behaviour towards my husband being replicated in my children. I know my sons have a few of my less savory character traits. (Which I'm working on by the Grace of God) Hmmm I going to think about this some more. :puzzled: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members futurehope Posted January 4, 2009 Members Share Posted January 4, 2009 Definitely no doubt about it - our children learn more from watching us than from what we say and they tend to act according to what they have learned. Worst of it is, they will pick up on our bad habits as quickly or maybe even more so than they do on our good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members joyfulpraise93 Posted January 4, 2009 Members Share Posted January 4, 2009 It's really humbling to me to see such honesty. Most women (myself included probably) would just push it off on their husbands. You know that "He's just like his daddy" thing. It's great to see someone who takes responsibility for their own actions and tries to change them. I hope I can be as honest about myself as you are in this, Suzy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 I think there is a lot of factors here but for action wise I think you should start with prayer for you, your son and your husband. Then go to christianadhd.com this site is not just for parents with adhd children. It really is wonderful for all parents. They have many resources and you should spend some time looking through it but for right now print off their bible study one Authority. I am going through this with my children, luckily I found this while they are young, and my sister is doing it with her mouthy and disrespectful 13 year old daughter. Also if you don't do this already I think you need to start having a short bible reading time with your children and prayer time. There is something powerful that happens when you as a family take time to read God's word and pray together. Another thought is how much do you monitor your son and other children's TV shows. It is amazing what is shown even on "children" channels. He could be learning some of his behavior from that too. I do pray for you. I know it feels so out of control when your children are treating you this way. You know you have lost control and have no idea how to gain it again. I hope some of this helps. God be with you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bzmomo7 Posted January 5, 2009 Author Members Share Posted January 5, 2009 Thank you all for your replies! It has been greatly helpful. I would also covet your prayers as my husband and I have talked a lot about this through the weekend and are prayerfully outlining a plan of action. I will write more later as I have optometry appts. and such today and will keep me gone much of the afternoon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bzmomo7 Posted January 7, 2009 Author Members Share Posted January 7, 2009 I think there is a lot of factors here but for action wise I think you should start with prayer for you, your son and your husband. Then go to christianadhd.com this site is not just for parents with adhd children. It really is wonderful for all parents. They have many resources and you should spend some time looking through it but for right now print off their bible study one Authority. I am going through this with my children, luckily I found this while they are young, and my sister is doing it with her mouthy and disrespectful 13 year old daughter. Also if you don't do this already I think you need to start having a short bible reading time with your children and prayer time. There is something powerful that happens when you as a family take time to read God's word and pray together. Another thought is how much do you monitor your son and other children's TV shows. It is amazing what is shown even on "children" channels. He could be learning some of his behavior from that too. I do pray for you. I know it feels so out of control when your children are treating you this way. You know you have lost control and have no idea how to gain it again. I hope some of this helps. God be with you! I looked at this Bible study.....the hubby is considering doing it (and tailoring it to our family) with the kids and "aiming" it at the younger ones while the older ones are there so that it is a reinforcement to them without it making my son especially feel as if it is directed at him in particular. Thank you all for your input and the PM's that I've gotten. You all have been extremely helpful! My husband and I talked for quite some time over the passed few days and we both have apologized for different things and have renewed our determination to see that these kids of ours get the training and guidance from us that they need. I think it is getting harder than it was even when my teenage daughters were little! The hubby is going to take my son on a father/son thing and spend some time talking with him, we are going to work some more physical activity into my son's life to help him manage some of that new testosterone he has, and give him some new responsibilities/priviledges that he hasn't had before. We are also hammering out a plan for discipline when the need for it arises. We sure are not perfect parents, I'll tell you that, but I sure feel a whole lot better and more encouraged after talking with you guys. Things were so much simpler when he was 2 years old! Discipline and training was straightforward anyway, even if it wasn't easy. Thank you for all your prayers, as well. You know, this is why I LOVE Online Baptist, thanks Bro. Matt!! :thumb :thumb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Administrators HappyChristian Posted January 7, 2009 Administrators Share Posted January 7, 2009 I looked at this Bible study.....the hubby is considering doing it (and tailoring it to our family) with the kids and "aiming" it at the younger ones while the older ones are there so that it is a reinforcement to them without it making my son especially feel as if it is directed at him in particular. Thank you all for your input and the PM's that I've gotten. You all have been extremely helpful! My husband and I talked for quite some time over the passed few days and we both have apologized for different things and have renewed our determination to see that these kids of ours get the training and guidance from us that they need. I think it is getting harder than it was even when my teenage daughters were little! The hubby is going to take my son on a father/son thing and spend some time talking with him, we are going to work some more physical activity into my son's life to help him manage some of that new testosterone he has, and give him some new responsibilities/priviledges that he hasn't had before. We are also hammering out a plan for discipline when the need for it arises. We sure are not perfect parents, I'll tell you that, but I sure feel a whole lot better and more encouraged after talking with you guys. Things were so much simpler when he was 2 years old! Discipline and training was straightforward anyway, even if it wasn't easy. Thank you for all your prayers, as well. You know, this is why I LOVE Online Baptist, thanks Bro. Matt!! :thumb :thumb :clap: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 It is so great to hear of your guys dedication and it sounds like you have a great plan! God Bless you and your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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