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Everything posted by Wmccarthy99

  1. Thanks Don! BTW Welcome to the forum!
  2. Exodus 20:24 An altar of earth thou shalt make unto me, and shalt sacrifice thereon thy burnt-offerings, and thy peace offerings, thy sheep, and thine oxen: in all places where I record my name I will come unto thee, and I will bless thee.
  3. Hello Bangoo James and welcome! I hope you find some good advice on this forum. I'm not married, but I feel if God really put that special person in your life to marry, then that is a great thing, even though it won't be perfect. I think what's more important is knowing that God is, and that His glory can be shown to the world by your love for Him and each other. How much better could it really get on earth? Maybe having children and grandchildren that also become saved and live holy lives that glorify Jesus' name? Proverbs 20:7 "The just man walketh in his integrity: his children are blessed after him." I met a couple from India once that were an arranged marriage, they got to meet each other for 5 minutes once before they got married, It was completely decided by the parents. That's sounds a lot different than your story.
  4. It's definitely not an Independent Baptist church. My prayer now is that the Lord to help me find a New Testament church that I can grow with and learn from. And I thank the Lord for all the help you guys on this site have given me with all these questions. I myself was even on the fence about my stance on eternal security, but through His word He has settled my heart on this blessed truth.
  5. This is almost exactly what I've heard him say. I've heard a number of others in the church say it as well.
  6. A great scripture that really shows the truth about eternal security. "they follow me". I actually just went and saw my pastor. we didn't get to talk long but this issue was raised up when he basically said the Jesus' salvation for and individual is final... as long as we keep walking with him! That sounds wrong to me. I have been do a fair amount of research and praying about eternal security recently because I wasn't quite sure where I stood on it. What the Lord has been teaching me through my reading is that temptations and trials prove us to show whether or not we are true children of the King. I praise the Lord that you brought that verse up and wonder at why it never spoke to me that way before. I am beginning to think this is where I have to take my stand in why I have to leave this church. I love the pastor very much, and have learned a lot from him. But at this church we play CCM and he reads from the NKJV. Many members of the church use the NIV and other modern versions. There's only a couple of us that use the KJV . I have been with them for about 9 months, so I have really bonded with the pastor and most of the members, (small church, only about 30-50 regularly attend) so that made it hard for me to split with them in a peaceable and honest way. It feels wrong to just leave, and though I do have problems with the modern versions and the music, I feel uncomfortable telling everyone that's why I'm leaving. But a strong disagreement on a fundamental doctrinal issue is a different story!
  7. I'd like to thank everyone that has contributed to this thread and just wanted to let you know it has been a huge encouragement to me! That's the pivotal point of the verse probably, what does it mean to truly fall away? I still don't totally understand it, but there is a reassurance in my heart that this is not what has happened to me after studying His word and reading everyone's comments. These verses come to mind. "(For our weapons of warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds;) Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;" 2 Cor 10:4,5
  8. I do desire to live a holy life, I've been so frustrated recently that the drive is diminishing though. There was a time when I had more of a desire to I would say. I have resisted going back to my old habits, but there is so many sins that are internal and from the heart that it gets frustrating. That's not exactly why I doubt my salvation, although at times it is. I definately don't see any good fruit in my life. The main issue I've got going on is dealing with the verses from Hebrews 6:4-6 There was a time when I was still living in daily gross sin. I had an air of pride and arrogance and did not want to forsake the lifestyle I was living, though I was being convicted that it was not the right way to live and that Christ is Savior. I desired to put this conviction out of my mind so that I could keep living this way. There were even times when I really believed from the heart that I was living for the enemy, but I still desired that life so much that I kept putting it out of my head. Not long after the peak of these experiences I tried to stop living that way through my own works and by just being a "good person". I stopped hanging out with those people and moved far away from anyone I knew. Finally two years later I just admitted that Christ is Savior and I needed to live "like a Christian". Since I had never spent time in a church, all I had to go off was my very faulty interpretation of the Bible, and what I had always thought Christianity was about, which was faith plus maintaining salvation through works. This never brought me any peace or assurance, and after going to church regularly I learned that this was not true Christianity. Anyways I worry that during that time of my willful rebellion I may have committed apostasy. One thing I have to go off is at least after those times it was still like God was drawing me to Him, which gives me hope.
  9. You're right, something I've always been told, and something I learn time and time again. "If our heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart, and knoweth all things." 1 John 3:20 the main issue I'm having with that is understanding Hebrews 6:4-6 I get scarred that I'm beyond repentance. I'm praying my way and reading my way through this but ever since I first read that verse it's stuck with me, I'm able to put it aside usually but it always rear's it's head again. Basically I'm in search of assurance from God, or scripture that changes my idea on my position with those verses.
  10. Thanks Jim, for the convicting comment. Also inspiring to keep going... This struggle has even made me tempted to go back to old ways of living, it's really discouraging.
  11. Yeah I've definately thought of that and I'm sure there's a little bit of that going on as well. At least he's a captive audience. I had sent him a letter about 3 weeks ago and after sending it I kind of regretted some of the things I wrote, and also realized that there were things that I should've mentioned that I didn't. Praise the Lord the letter got rejected and turned back!
  12. At least that's what I've been lead to believe, though again if I am saved I am such a babe that I'm not really one that would know too much. I think what I'm going through I really need to pray hard about and seek the Lord for guidance. I've come to believe that if it was impossible for me to repent I would not be being drawn to him. Even after I went through a period of outright rebellion against Him and kinda settled down, I was still experiencing convictions daily, even to the point that when I was facing stressful times in my life because of worldly problems their was a peace knowing that Jesus was so much more than that. The Lord is wonderful, I just need to trust that and stop fussing. Thank you for helping out 360watt. God Bless.
  13. Thanks swathdiver. The church I've been attending is a Calvary Chapel. I'm not going to go into exactly what I disagree with the church about, but I'm leaving. I just need to do it the right way. I've come to realize it is not the right church for me, but the members and the pastor have become great friends of mine. The pastor has spent a lot of time counseling me and I am thankful for that. I've actually visited two IFB churches recently and I'm going back to one of them tomorrow for their Wednesday night study, it's called Sacramento Baptist Church, they sing hymns along with a pianist, preach from the KJV, preach eternal security, and are active in soul winning and ministering to the homeless. It's about an hour away from where I live though and I've been trying to find a job and a place down there but nothing has opened up. There is one more that I've found online that's a little closer and I might go check it out Sunday. I live about an hour away from Sacramento CA, and the closest KJV church to where I live is 45 min from my house.
  14. Thank you swathdiver for taking the time to help. That is very kind of you.
  15. Thanks for responding 360 watt, and this gives me a little encouragement to hear that others go through this as well. I definately acknowledged my sin, actually felt sorrowful over it and believed that Jesus Christ could still save me, that's about as far as it went. I only finally made a confession to my mom that I believed in Him probably months later. I believed for a while, but went back to my old ways pretty much immediately Recently I've realized I never really understood how one becomes saved. I knew you had to place your faith in Christ, but because of ignorance and false teachings I've thought that there was always something added to it like "commit your life to Christ" or "surrender everything to Him". There's a couple reasons I believe that Hebrews 6:4-8 is talking about non believers 4 For it is impossible for those who were once enlightened, and have tasted of the heavenly gift, and were made partakers of the Holy Ghost, 5 And have tasted the good word of God, and the powers of the world to come, 6 If they shall fall away, to renew them again unto repentance; seeing they crucify to themselves the Son of God afresh, and put him to an open shame. 7 For the earth which drinketh in the rain that cometh oft upon it, and bringeth forth herbs meet for them by whom it is dressed, receiveth blessing from God: 8 But that which beareth thorns and briers is rejected, and is nigh unto cursing; whose end is to be burned. The main reason being verse 8. I don't believe anyone who has been born again will be rejected, no matter how bad they sin. Also, the quick lesson of Esau in Hebrews 12:17 17: For ye know how that afterward, when he would have inherited the blessing, he was rejected: for he found no place of repentance, though he sought it carefully with tears. As to being partakers of the Holy Spirit, isn't King Saul an example of this? He prophesied, and later God took away His Spirit and sent him a spirit of distress. Just my two cents though. I have heard that Hebrews 6:4-6 is talking about someone who falls away in unbelief so badly that they never even want to come back, but I don't find that very convincing. The story of Jacob and Esau fits in so perfectly, the ridiculous trade of his inheritance for a bowl of soup, and later regretting it greatly,but not able to repent.
  16. Can someone please help me? I have been have many doubts about my salvation for many months now. All these thought go through my head: was my repentance real? did I really put ALL my trust in the blood of Jesus Christ? Is it now impossible for me to repent?. Quite honestly sometimes I don't know how much longer I can hold on. When I try to overcome these doubts by remembering my testimony, I really wonder if it was real or not. I'll try to make it short but it goes like this. I was camping with a bunch of people I didn't really know about 4 years ago, I drank a bunch of psychedelic cool-aid. I went through many hours of what can only be described as demonic torment, while bathing in a tub of my own iniquity. It was at the end of a 6 month long hitchhiking trip across america and I had been picked up by alot of Christians along the way who shared the Gospel with me. During this trip it all just hit me and this was the first time in my life I really was hit by the reality of sin. Anyways this went on for hours and hours, and eventually I just kind of gave up struggling and admitted to myself that I just deserved to die and that was that. everything went black, then I saw a really bright light. I just immediately knew that God was real and Jesus Christ was the way to heaven, and the only other place to go was hell. I knew it and I just felt really bad, like " how could I have ever done this to someone so pure and loving and undeserving" I figured "man I really messed up, I took the wrong path, now I'm doomed". Then it was almost like something just told me that It's not too late at all and this is the whole message of the Gospel and I believed it. Then I heard a girl say to me "come into the light brother" and I snapped out of it. I don't know if the light really was God or just someone shining a flash light directly into my face, and the girl was probably just some hippy that was trying to help me off the ground, but what went on in my thoughts and heart was incredibly real.I don't remember what happened right after this because I was still unbelievably high but I remember i even cursed God and started believing in some weird occultish things like astrology that same night. I never told anyone who was there what happened. Anyways ever since this happened the way I viewed life was completely changed, I didn't want to forsake the lifestyle I was living in, but I was always fighting against this moral conviction that it was wrong and Christ was the way. I lived a life of complete sin and even at one point wanted this conviction to go away so I could be just happy doing what I was doing, I even remember at one point thinking "I don't care I want to live this way, I want to live for this evil way." I still knew how wrong I was,and there was a point in my life when I tried to separate myself from that lifestyle and I would at times pray to God when I was in desperate need of help, and it seemed that every time he answered. at one point I even was given a King James New Testament from a church and I would read it every once in a while but I couldn't understand it very well. One day (3 years later) I just admitted that Jesus Christ was the way and I needed to live for Him and turn from my sin. Ever since then I have had a very "works righteous" approach to everything. I eventually found about how this is wrong, but it's just kind of ingrained in me and hard to shake. Anyways, I doubt I'm saved really. And that worries me, but what really worries me was when I found out about verses 4-6 in Hebrews 6. I worry that I'm what Paul was talking about, one who tasted the good word of God, I was enlightened and tasted of the powers of things to come, but I turned away and even made a vow that this was what I wanted. I read the bible all the time and pray daily in hopes of hope, but I think sometimes that God is done with me and I just can't ever genuinely repent again. That guilty remorse I had that night was soo real, and It's just crazy because when I read about true repentence it fits into exactly what I felt, and I had never heard of what true repentence was before. It was sooo real. I just need to know if there is any scripture anywhere that can help me, I'm either not yet saved, doomed with no hope, or at a really hard time with my walk with Chriist, and I hope it's either the first or the latter. Help?
  17. Yeah I'm going to put that letter in the mail tonight. I've thought about it long enough. Your're right about him at least being a captive audience and praise God for that. He knows he's a sinner, he's already told me, he has even said he believes that Jesus paid the price for everyone's sins on the cross. but then he said he is reading the book of mormon because it's like going back to his roots. I'm just going to ask him if he know's he's a sinner deserving of hell, if he knows that Jesus Christ paid the price for sin by his death, and then tell him to put his faith in His work only for his salvation. I've unfortunately always been someone who beats around the bush when witnessing to people, I was convicted about his really hard just yesterday, and I can't do it any longer. That's really sad they won't let you into the jails... That seems illegal if you've never had a felony and you've never caused problems while you're in there, and even if some Independent Baptist did, that shouldn't mean that others can't go in because of that person. I'm no lawyer but that sounds like persecution to me. But alas... He said he's been seeing a Chaplain, but that same chaplain gave him a book of Mormon. I keep praying that the Lord will send him a saint.
  18. That's perfect thank you so much! Guess I should've poked around a little first. I would love to read through this when I have some time. I'm not aloud to view the link though probably because I'm such a new member.
  19. Hey y'all just wanted some thoughts on sharing the gospel with Mormon's. I've got a old friend in prison right now that I've been writing to and he told me he's reading the book of Mormon and the Bible. His family is Mormon, and he grew up going to their church. I moved back to my hometown and started hanging out with him again, and found out he had a really bad methamphetamine addiction. My prayer for him after I found this out was that he would get arrested before things got worse. Praise the Lord! Before he got arrested I had the opportunity to have many hard talks with him about what he was doing and talked with him about Jesus. I'm currently writing a letter to him and just wanted to know if anyone had any advice on this. Also if anyone could pray that God would give me wisdom on what to say to him that would be awesome. My friend's name is David, and I really do believe that the Holy Spirit is convicting him but he has fallen back on his works-righteous roots. God Bless.
  20. What exactly is spiritual warfare? I have heard many different theories on this and I just wanted to ask some Baptists what they thought on this. Is it simply resisting temptation, or is it that while we walk through this world we come against great resistance in unbelievers, is it standing in the truth while even our churches start to teach lies? I've heard many say that a lot of the time it is a very internal struggle, that the devil makes us feel like God is displeased with us and done with us, I've even heard that the enemy will "get into our head" and lead us in directions we shouldn't go or discourage us. I've heard it said by some that the "pulling down of strongholds" is a result of this inner struggle as we stand in the truth personally and stop believing lies about God, and I've heard it's talking about believers exposing lies in the world, the church, or other's lives as we bring them light. It seems to me if we get a little too carried away with everything being internal we could possibly dismiss a conviction from the Holy Spirit as something from the enemy.
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