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Is spanking always the right choice?


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When I was yet a young boy one Sudan morning I was dressed and ready to go to church. It had been raining nearly all week. So I told mother, "I'm going out side and I'm already dressed for church."

She told me "You can go out, but do not walk in the mud puddles."

Well, with nearly a weeks rain soaked in the ground there were a few mud puddles around our yard and I had not been outside to play hardly any in the past week. You know how young boys are, its so hard for them to walk around a mud puddle they think they can jump over. Yes I came upon one mud puddle, yes I told my self, I can jump over it, which I did. But when my feet hit the ground they went out from under me, do you know where the seat of my pants ended up? If you said setting in the mud puddle your right. The seat of my pants where soaked, along with the back of my shirt. I knew instantly I was in trouble, and the best thing I could do was go straight to mother, which I did.

But let me remind you, from the front side everything looked great. So I head in the house. I had to walk thru a bed room to get to where mother was. As I came thru that door mother was looking that direction two doors away from me. When she saw my face she asked, " What happened?"

I turned around and let her see my back side, which was not a pretty site to her on that Sunday morning with it nearly time for us to leave for church. She told me to quickly get those clothes of, I just knew this was not going to be good. She got another shirt out for me, and those wool dress slack I had worn to church the past winter. When we were finally on our way to church she instructed me to be on my best behavior this Sunday morning. I complained that my legs are itching. She informed me why I was having to wear these pants and told me you will not squirm in church because your legs are itching, you will not cause a distraction. Your already in enough trouble, but we will take care of it when we get home.

I was on my best behavior that Sunday morning at church, I caused no one to be distracted, to be honest I could not stop thinking about what would happen when we got home, so I knew my only hope was to be very good. I promise you, it was hard to set still in that church with those wool slacks rubbing my legs on a warm summer morning, hey, I did not even know what air conditioning was back them.

After getting home I went straight to my room and took these clothes off and waited in the kitchen for mother just as she had instructed me to do. So I set and waited thinking, "Boy I'm going to get it, this is not going to be good for me."

When mother came walking into the kitchen she said, "I guess we better get this over with, lets go to the bedroom." We did, mother explained to me I had disOBeyed her and why I should be punished for getting my Sunday clothes both muddy and wet. Them she said, Jesus forgives and so do I, I've got the feeling that there will never be anything like this happen again them she gave me a big hug. I was stunned.

I can promise you that nothing like that ever happen again and I have never forgot about that hug she gave me nor having forgive me for what I had done. I really believe what happened them did more for me than if she had taken a switch and had set the seat of my pants on fire. I promise you, I walked out of there knowing I deserved a whipping and not forgiveness and a hug, it forever change me.

I might add, there is a good lesson within what happened that day between my mother and I, and the forgiveness we can have from Jesus. The events of that day did help me a few years latter when I was saved.

Only one other thing I can add to this, my mother was a very smart godly mother who seemed to have much wisdom in her head that she put to good use. There are times for spanking, but if one will use godly wisdom as my mother did, they will find they can teach a better longer lasting lesson at times without a spanking. Mother change my heart that day, I don't believe a spanking would have ever done that.

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Before I read the ending, I was thinking to myself, "Hmm, I don't think I would spank for that." There is a time for discipline and a time for love and mercy. Sounds like your mother had that wisdom and knew the balance pretty well! That's something I need to remember in my own prayers.

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I was surprised at the outcome. Mother was quite strict about me taking care of my Sunday going to church clothes, for I generally had only one pair of slacks for church and had not the money to replace them.

But after all this time I figure she thought I got quite a bit of punishment wearing those itching wool slacks in hot weather. Looking back I sure deserved being punished for I knew better than to jump the mud puddle. But mother taught me a valuable lesson and from them on I did take better care of my clothes while I learned a bit about mercy and forgiveness.

Had a good friend, when he did wrong he would always get a very hard whipping with a belt, I always thought his father was a bit harsh on him and still think he was. I got very few whipping, mostly a good talking to. But I understand children are different and the parents surely needs much godly wisdom in order to mete out the proper punishment when the child does wrong.

Of course there be many children who only hear, if you do that your really going to get it yet they never get it and they are spoiled rotten and the parents lose all control over their children.

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I think your mother saw through you that you felt bad about it. If you didn't care, you prOBably would have been spanked.
I think it is pretty bad for a parent to spank a child out of anger even if a child sincerely apologize (without the parent asking her to apologize or confess) and really showed it too.

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I think your mother saw through you that you felt bad about it. If you didn't care, you prOBably would have been spanked.
I think it is pretty bad for a parent to spank a child out of anger even if a child sincerely apologize (without the parent asking her to apologize or confess) and really showed it too.


It's so important to pray for wisdom and discernment in parenting. If a parent can see a child is truly sorrowful and repentant and has therefore learned a lesson there is likely no reason for punishment.

In fact, the ultimate goal of spankings should be to help children realize the importance of rules and of OBeying them and learning to be responsible in these areas.

If a child has learned enough to know when they have broken a rule, and especially if they come to the parent admitting what they have done, and they are truly sorry for what they did and repentent, then they are showing the growth we desire.
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Your mom sounds like she was a wise lady, Jerry8! I'm sure those itchy pants did more to punish you than a spanking ever could!! :lol:

And then the love and mercy from your mom. What a great picture of Christ!


Right, it was a perfect picture of mercy and grace. Perhaps that took place in that manner because we were always in church for both Bible study and preaching services so that kept things in the proper order in my mothers mind.

So many people just can't understand, they will not know what to do in many situations unless they stay in God's Word. It has all of our answers to following His perfect will, its our Guide, our Instruction Book. Our conscience cannot guide us if its not throughly saturated with God's Word.
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