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Backslidden


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I know this is not the place to solve such a problem as mine, but at this time in my life this is the only contact with christians that I have.
In Nov 2003, I knew I was saved, I was baptized and asked Jesus into my life when I was 9 or 10. I am not sure if I was saved then or not. But that Nov. I knew. God illuminated my mind and heart. It was as if He literally took my old nasty heart threw it away and gave me a new one. I hated sin and got rid of anything that reflected it. From the friends I had to the clothes I wore. God gave me understanding of his word. I could read the Bible and teach others very clearly. There was love, peace and even a living water running thru me. Pure joy.
I became self rightous after a few months, looking at other christians and the unsaved and chopping their heads off with the Bible because they were not living to what it said. I remember one time the realization of eternal savation and that I could not lose it, but also realizing that if you werent living in the will of God it would be almost impossible to know if you were saved.
Needless to say I soon found myself a miserable christian, and God wasnt anywhere to be found. I was so unhappy and sad, I prayed and prayed for God to restore my joy. He never answered. I lost my joy and my understanding, when I read the Bible it was just words that had no effect on my heart. I backslid into the life I lived before I was saved. A place that I would have put my life on that I wouldnt end up at that place, I was. I felt my heart melt at each sin. But I didnt know what to do, it was easier to run than to be miserable. I have lived my life this way for the past 3 1/2 years, now trying to go back to God.
This is my confusion now. I know that I was saved, but I hear sermons saying that if a person goes back into such sin they weren't saved to begin with. So I see it as either I am saved and God is far from me, or I was saved but gave it up.
I know I dont feel saved like I once did, I pray and pray and wait but I have no peace, no direction, I have no clue what God wants me to do or where he wants me to go. I am so sad. All I want is God back in my life.
If anyone has been thru such a situation please respond. Thank You

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Well, my situation was a bit different, but I will try to be of as much assistance as possible:
I was, I believe, saved nine years ago. I did, however, go through some times when I was older that I didn't know whether or not I was saved. I knew shortly after experiencing that I was indeed saved - however, that did not help me.

To put it lightly, I've pretty much been a backslidden Christian most of my walk with the Lord. Oh, I had the right beliefs, yes; but I didn't really ever read my Bible and pray.
Finally, shortly after I was sure I was saved, I began sinking into sin. That was about three years ago or so.
I began sinking deeper and deeper into inquity; I didn't really care I was saved. At least, my life didn't show it.

Finally, about seven months ago, that began to change. My mother had been praying for me - unknown to me (in fact, she didn't even know about all the problems I had) - and, suddenly, sin's pleasure basically left me, and I began being molded into the Christian I am now.

I began reading my Bible more; praying more; etc. I began witnessing on the Internet.
Yes, I've had my bouts with sin since then, but most of it left me around September or so. The Lord truly has worked mightily in my life. :wink I praise Him for it, as I so didn't deserve it.
He pulled me out of my sin, and placed me back on the right track. Now, I am growing in Him, I try to hand out tracts when I can, and I am not afraid to stand up for what is right.

As to your problem:
"This is my confusion now. I know that I was saved, but I hear sermons saying that if a person goes back into such sin they weren't saved to begin with. So I see it as either I am saved and God is far from me, or I was saved but gave it up.
I know I dont feel saved like I once did, I pray and pray and wait but I have no peace, no direction, I have no clue what God wants me to do or where he wants me to go. I am so sad. All I want is God back in my life."
I sunk into deep sin, but I knew I was, indeed, still saved. Christians are not impervious to falling back to their old nature. I believe you were as well.

You said you have no peace, no direction, and no clue what the Lord wants you to do or where He wants you to go. May I give you this advice: surrender yourself to Him. Read His Word more, pray more, praise Him and His Holy Name - it did wonders for me. I went from a majorly backslidden Christian to a Christian who is learning and growing, who wishes to live a life honoring and pleasing to my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, and who hopes to be used mightily by Him.

In closing, I ask do the things I suggested a bit above (the part I bolded). The Christian life is not easy, but we have Christ - and we can do all things through Him, as Philippians 4:13 tells us. :smile

Allow me to pray a quick prayer for you:
Dear Heavenly Father, I pray that you would help now with Your son, Lewiski. Work in his life, Lord, give him the strength to follow You. Keep him from sin, and shield him from the attacks of our adversary, the Devil. Remind him that You will never leave him nor forsake him; that he can do all things through You. Lift him up now, Lord, help him, I pray, in Christ's name, Amen.

You will continue to be in my prayers, my brother. :wink
God bless,
Crushmaster.

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:goodpost:

When we are backslidden it's us who have placed sin between ourselves and God. Once saved, always saved is a biblical fact. God is still right there, He never leaves or forsakes us, but when we turn our backs on Him and live in sin we grieve the Holy Ghost and God can't look upon us while we are covered in sin.

In order to restore that "feeling" of being saved, of knowing God is there, of hearing God answer your prayers, you have to deal with the sin. First John 1:9 tells us that if we confess our sins, repent and turn back to God He will forgive us.

Consider the parable of the prodigal son. The father didn't go anywhere, it was the son who put distance between himself and his father for the sake of living a sinful life. When the son finally realized his lost condition he repented and returned to his father. When his father saw him coming back to him he ran and embraced him. This is a beatuiful picture of exactly how your Heavenly Father awaits your return to Him. If you truly confess your sins and repent of them God will once again embrace you.

First of all, you must deal with the sin in your life. Confess them to God, truly repent of them, turn from them, ask the Lord to help grant you the strength courage and fortitude to cast those sins from you; to fill you with the Holy Ghost and help you to walk in the Spirit and not in the flesh.

Read your Bible DAILY! Set aside a time each day to read the Word of God. If possible, read the from the Bible more than once a day, but at the least, be sure to read from the Word each day. If you can, make it one of the first things you do each day.

Pray! Pray before and after reading the Word. Pray when you first awake and before you go to sleep. Be mindful to pray throughout the day, even if they are just little 10 second prayers thanking God for something or asking God's guidance or protection about something.

Find a Bible believing, Gospel preaching church and faithfully attend services.

Seek out Christian friends.

As you begin walking again with the Lord be mindful of what brought about your backsliding and keep such matters in prayer so this doesn't happen again

Continue to seek help and prayer right here.

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I have to totally agree with you John. If I could add just one other thing to your advice. Having been in the almost exact same position, I would add this...Stop looking for a feeling my friend, your salvation is based on God's grace not how you feel. Which you most likely know. Having been saved for a few years now, I can tell you that I don't always feel saved. But I know that God said He would never leave me nor forsake me (even if that means standing behind me while I waller in the mud). Just keep moving forward. Read, Pray, and attend church. I know it sounds simple, but it has a profound effect if you stick with it. Even if it "Feels" like your prayers are hitting the ceiling, and your reading is an exercise in futility, keep doing it. God will meet you at your place of need.

I'll be praying for you Brother.

Bro Ed

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lew,

The fact that you are concerned is proof that God is tugging at your heart. You're just like the younger son in the story of the prodigal that found himself eating husks in the swine-hog pen. He came to himself and asked why he would even do such an horrible thing. WELLA!!! He got up and left that filthy hole. You need to do the same.

Do this::::::::::

Begin reading your Bible again. Start in the New Testament. take a notebook along and for every verse that you see that has to do with you, write it down on the left-facing page. On the right facing page opposite it, write down how that applies to you and what you should do about it. Is it a command to obey, a promise to hold, a precept to follow, sin to avoid, etc. etc.????????? Write it all down and be obedient to it. Put yourself in subjection to it. You'll soon see why the KJV is the only book in the whole wide world that is vibrantly alive. Pray constantly about these things and talk to God in your mind begging and pleading for His help and guidance.

I'm not going to tell you to quit anything, or go to church, or to cultivate Christian friends as all of those things will be covered in your reading. It's up to you to obey.

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Here's the advice that had results for me when all else failed. It is hard hitting, drastic and most don't do it....all those who have come to me with your circumstance to whom I said this and who did it, found the results almost immediate and lasting.

1. Down on your knees, hands raised, plead God to hear....see...and let not his countenance be fallen toward thee. Tell him you are sorry for the gulf you have created (he does not create the situations your in...and I was in...we do that).

2. Then up, remove all things that are an offense unto the spirit of God from your home: a. All false Bibles (by that I most certainly mean nonKJB). All magazines, books, games or items of that nature you know to promote, contain, endorse or otherwise exemplify rebellion to God. I tossed about $2000 in magazines (National Geographic) and art books. Get anything you know is contradicting to the Bible.... OUT! Not just in the trash....but gone...haul it off! Booz of any kind, cigarettes etc.... out, done, gone!

3. Turn the TV off...its a constant stream of profane, lascivious, adulterous, promiscuity.... and it is a time waster that could be better spent in prayer and devotion to God's word. Haul off all music, movies, videos - everything containing things offensive to God. To the dump with it.

4. Then back down to the knees and pray till the tears come....beg, plead...cry out, I shall not get up till thou hearest me my Lord and my God! Repent....forsake...confess everything wrong.... then like the prodigal go home in prayer and say I am no more worthy to be called thy son...but wilt thou yet forgive.....

I promise our father will answer..... You've got to mean it! You say this is too much... I say, can anything be too much to pay for restoration of fellowship with the Lord of Hosts? Is any temporary material thing here worth the impact on the eternal and unseen?

It is worth it!!! Believe me!!!!! I wake up with hymns in my head and a laugh on my lips more often than not. I spend my days with mirth, comfort, peace, joy and nearness of God. Sanctify the house of the Lord again and he will bless it.

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:goodpost: , Pastor Harrison, but add one thing more:::::::::;

Let God do most of the talking. (((((He speaks to us thru His Word, and we speak to Him in prayer))))) This is why i say read your KJV till there ain't even no tomorrow, and praying and begging and pleading at the very same time. ...and yes, down on your knees, face in the dust in the most abject humility you can possibly muster.

Whilst you're doing all of this, exercise much thanksgiving to God for His great mercy that endureth forever. I've gotten more and better answers to praising than I ever did from a-cryin' and a-bawlin' and a-caterwaulin', even though at a time like this those things are also VERY NECESSARY.

Oh, BTW, yes, take that TV out in the back and SHOOT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Then make a humongous bonfire of everything (books, music tapes, pictures, CDs, videos, etc., etc.) that in any way shape or form would exalt themselves against the Character of God.

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:goodpost: , Pastor Harrison, but add one thing more:::::::::;

Let God do most of the talking. (((((He speaks to us thru His Word, and we speak to Him in prayer))))) This is why i say read your KJV till there ain't even no tomorrow, and praying and begging and pleading at the very same time. ...and yes, down on your knees, face in the dust in the most abject humility you can possibly muster.

Whilst you're doing all of this, exercise much thanksgiving to God for His great mercy that endureth forever. I've gotten more and better answers to praising than I ever did from a-cryin' and a-bawlin' and a-caterwaulin', even though at a time like this those things are also VERY NECESSARY.

Oh, BTW, yes, take that TV out in the back and SHOOT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Then make a humongous bonfire of everything (books, music tapes, pictures, CDs, videos, etc., etc.) that in any way shape or form would exalt themselves against the Character of God.


Quit right.....
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Pray for me to do the above where able(husband would kill me if I threw out his movies and video games but they aren't mine) Pray please! :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray

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Pray for me to do the above where able(husband would kill me if I threw out his movies and video games but they aren't mine) Pray please! :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray


I hear ya.... I too loved PC games.... love the old westerns and action movies..... and not a stinking one of them didn't have a pentagram, profanity, or a scantily provocatively dressed woman in them.... God nailed me down on that and said in my heart.... how long you gone ignore those things in the interest of your personal entertainment?

Broke my heart..... but out they went! Hundreds in movies, games and cds and music... I found myself warring against my own flesh. I'd toss a beloved but inappropriate game and my hand would say "NO!!!!!!" :verymad: and then my spirit would say "oh you don't want to part with that eh?....hmm...wonder why not?" Which would of course result in even more scrutiny of spirit over entertainments of the flesh. Then I'd grab three more games just to prove to my flesh I would toss them for the Lord and dare it to stop me! :loco

When I did.....when each one having something wrong was tossed and gone, I felt within that God was pleased and my flesh was in the corner sulking. :Green
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I hear ya.... I too loved PC games.... love the old westerns and action movies..... and not a stinking one of them didn't have a pentagram, profanity, or a scantily provocatively dressed woman in them.... God nailed me down on that and said in my heart.... how long you gone ignore those things in the interest of your personal entertainment?

Broke my heart..... but out they went! Hundreds in movies, games and cds and music... I found myself warring against my own flesh. I'd toss a beloved but inappropriate game and my hand would say "NO!!!!!!" :verymad: and then my spirit would say "oh you don't want to part with that eh?....hmm...wonder why not?" Which would of course result in even more scrutiny of spirit over entertainments of the flesh. Then I'd grab three more games just to prove to my flesh I would toss them for the Lord and dare it to stop me! :loco

When I did.....when each one having something wrong was tossed and gone, I felt within that God was pleased and my flesh was in the corner sulking. :Green


Amen. :amen:

I to was a lover of old westerns. I to told my self there was nothing wrong with me watching them. Gunsmoke was one of my favorites.

But there truth is its filled with stuff that a child of God should not allow in their mind. Just as nearly every TV show or movie that is shown.

Hollywood,TV & movie, entrainment business, is comeptely at odds with God. In fact they hate God, for if they truly obeyed God, they would lose much money, for their money comes from portraying sin.

How can any child of God set and enjoy, and laugh at, something that is portraying sins against God of which he gave His Son to save us from?
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Ahh yes...Gunsmoke.... the Rifleman.... Bonanza..... High Chaparal(?).... Big Valley.... my dad and I watched them all regularly.... Filled to over-flowing with Saloons, whiskey, bar maids (to be polite), and dialogue to cast doubt on all things Biblically sound.

Star Trek!! Man I loved Star Trek.... but watch that with a Bible in hand and you'll toss every single episode out or put your Bible away in a dark corner somewhere out of heart and out of sight.

After a while I personally got angry about it....it was like "OK Holleywood....so you're forcing me to make a choice eh.... well you blew it.....I'm no spiritual compromiser....." and I turned the TV off 6 yrs ago. My kids (who were teens then) went ballistic, thought Dad was off the deep end for sure...Ruby Ridge an all that foolishness....thought we were turning Amish :lol: But now, after all these yrs, they can't stand tv either. They go to friend's homes and sit dumbfounded at seeing how the tv turns folk into zombies. They tell me regularly now how bored they are when a friend who watches tv gets mesmerized by it and they get up and leave lol :pray And I am very thankful for what God has done for me there.

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Pray for me to do the above where able(husband would kill me if I threw out his movies and video games but they aren't mine) Pray please! :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray :pray


Praying for your husband pixiedust! :pray

Why not just box up all those movies and games and put them in the back of your husbands closet or out in his tool shed? He can't get mad about it then, can he?
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I recall watching an episode of Bonanza several years back, the Bonanza crew were either on their way to church or it was right after they walked out of church, they were in the saloon having drinks and discussing church and the problem they were having in that episode.

It hit me like a ton of brick, why am I watching this? Why is this entertaining to me? Why do I enjoy this? No, God would not want me to fill my mind with such stuff and enjoy seeing sins against Him portrayed on a TV screen.

And Gunsmoke, it always seemed to end with them in the Long Branch having drinks around the big table, what is entertaining about that to a child of God?

Quite some time after that I saw my pastor come out of the video rental store carrying several VCR movies while on his way to evening church service having complained that very morning of not having enough time to get enough sleep because he was overworked.

But it hit me even bigger mid week, when I saw him coming out of the same video store carrying about as many VCR movies in his hands as he could carry without dropping the whole load.

A few weeks later he was complaining about not getting enough sleep, I mentioned, its is hard to get enough rest when one watches many VCR movies each week, he frowned at me and walked on.

I know I have my own faults, I know I have many of them, I know its much easier to see other peoples faults than to see my very own faults. Discussing such things as this can be a learning experience. As I live my life I'm trying to correct my faults as I learn and I hope I can be a help with others by sharing.

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