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When You're Alone


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My husband also doesn't go anywhere for that long and luckily since we got married we have not been even separated for 1 day. When he is working and I am not, I usually try to do something with the way I look: I take a longer shower than usual, arrange my hair, do something with my feet and nails. Generally speaking, I do things that I can do by myself so that when Adrian comes we can spend as much time together as possible.BTW we do not have children.

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I'm use to having my wife home every night, and me being here too.

Since her twin sister has been diagnosed with Mesothelioma cancer and it being in the last stage, she has been gone to stay with her 2 times leaving me home alone.

Sure is a very strange feeling.

The first night after climbing into bed, I though how hard it must be on those who lose their husband and or wife knowing they will never be back.

I may have to go thru several of these before its over, but I would not hold her back from spending time with her twin for nothing, but it sure is lonely around here with out her.

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Usually I'm the one who goes and he stays home - my parents live in WA, and I go to visit them. We made the trip together last August, he for the first time seeing that gorgeous place, and at Christmas we will go again, but there are times I need to go when he can't, since my parents are getting on up there and need me.

When I am gone, he usually does the same ole stuff - only he's lonely, and, even though I'm with my folks, I am lonely for him!!

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I was somewhat suicidal the first couple of years, but as I have drawn closer to the Lord, I am getting used to living my life alone. I live each day with the confidence of knowing that nothing is going to happen that me and God can't handle together.

As to how I spend my days, I work 12-18 hours a day (one of the downfalls of being self-employed), then there is the usual cooking, cleaning, errands, etc. I take bible study breaks in between times.

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Five times in the past four years my wife has gone one week long trips. Twice to Nicaragua for humanitarian missions, once to Louisiana to cook for a team that was rebulding a church after Katrina, and twice on Habitat for Humanity builds. Helping others is a passion for her, and we generally have so little money that that kind of service means a lot to her.

I homeschool the kids, so when she's gone we generally keep on as usual, me working at my various projects, and the kids doing their homeschool. The first time I helped her tape Bible readings so each night she was gone I would play a tape of her reading the Bible for the kids.

When she was in Louisiana the cell phone companies were waving roaming charges for calls made to and from Katrina affected areas, so I got to talk to her almost every night. On the H4H builds I would call her hotel each night.

The time apart actually was good for us, because it helped us realize how much we meant to each other by how much we missed each other. Not something you get when you're never ever apart.

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