Single and don't really care

[Timothy]

Hey, I thought I might just ask a question about myself. Hey, it's not too personal, don't worry.

OK, most of my real life Christian friends are girls. This is a fact because, for some reason, most of the families in my area just had girls... I don't know... maybe it is tank water or something??? Most of the ones that I am familiar with are old enough to get married to. Most of them aren't bad to look at either, but I think what's in the heart is more important anyway. Hey, if we only chose our friends by what they looked like, what a lonely world this would be!!!!

I seem to get different advice all the time, but I suppose I could listen to more...

I'm as dense as a 4 layer brick wall, and I'm not interested in any of these girls romantically. It seems to bother everyone but me!!!!

I'm just curious what you older people have to say.

[Psalms18_28]

maybe they are not your type, and that they seem more like your sisters than anything else. I was never attracted to any of the boys in my neighbor that I grew up with. Or maybe you feel like you have nothing in common with them (that they seem boring). Have you ever dated?

And I noticed alot techie people are not that interested in girls anyhow. They are too focused on computers (same with scientists, they are too focused on their research) But they do eventually find someone they really like and get married

[Anon]

My guess is that eventually one of them will end up as someone you decide you can't live without...sometimes "best friends" is a great way to start a marriage!

On the other hand maybe someone new will come along and you will know "this is it".

Hey don't worry, just enjoy your friendships! Just don't "lead them on" because I know of guys who are enjoying a simple friendship while all the while the girl is hoping for an engagement ring. As long as that's not the case, enjoy. :-) You have plenty of time.

[HappyChristian]

Don't let it bother you! You still have many years ahead of you. Finish your schooling or preparation for whatever the Lord has for you, and in the process He will bring you the one He has for you. When the time is right, you will know. And like Suzy said, be sure not to lead anyone on. Girls read romance into some pretty silly stuff, so just make sure you keep everything on a friend footing unless and until you are ready to change that. And don't let anyone force you into a relationship just because they think it's time for one!

[dwayner79]

Older Christians like to play match maker... my wife dealt with it a lot prior to meeting me. Unfortunately, they have forgotten about Paul's admonitions.

Try not to let them get to you. Enjoy life, enjoy God and while your doing that, someone may come along. I agree with Kitagrl about leading them on... Sometime we are doing that without realizing it... Make sure you're not. Reminds me of a country song, teardrops on my guitar. Noone wants to be Drew.

[Danny Carlton]

Don't let other push you into something you are ready for. the Bible is crystal clear on the matter. If you are single, don't seek to be married. I've seen it happen over and over again with people who follow this and in almost every case the person they eventually married, the relationship developed on its own. They were much happier than those who sought marriage.

[Timothy]

Thank you all for the feedback!

It is a shame, but I can't ask my parents about these little things... they are Christians, but most of my siblings are single, and they just want them married... then they all talk about it... so embarrassing!

I will maintain my friendships, and yes, they are more like sisters to me--I love them all, but as friends.

I'll be seeking God, and just let Him control things.

Thanks, God bless you all! :smile

[John81]

It sounds like you are on the right track Timothy. Trust God and let Him tell you who is the right one and when.

[Timothy]

:smile

[pep_3000]

I know exactly what you mean about having a lot of girls who are friends. Accually they are a whole lot closer to family. I love them, like you said, as friends and sisters. I would do anything for any one of them.

Reminds me of a country song, teardrops on my guitar. Noone wants to be Drew.

But it is worse to be in the other position. And just wanting them to be happy, even if it is not with you and it hurts.

P.S. that is a really good song.

[Jeny]

waiting for God's plan in our lives is very important, just have the patience. Pray that someone Godly will cross your path, pray constantly and wait patiently...

[OLD fashioned preacher]

1) Uncle Sam didn't issue my parka till he was sending me to Korea, relax - your in God's army now, He'll send a wife in His time
2) Most parents look forward to grandchildren when the kids are grown - you know you're in grandparent mode when you hold someone's baby, hand it back, and don't think you might want another one yourself
3) While it's always a nice bonus to have an attractive spouse - when you're both in your 80's, you'll both be ugly :Green
4) Most people have been trained up in the world's mindset - so if you're 20+ and not at least engaged, they look @ you and ask "what's wrong, don't you function?"

Just some maybe not so senile rambling.

[Maxmya]

tilmothy:

I never married anyone in my neighborhoold. I did meet someone at a Christian college I married. i have been married for 34 years. I counsel you to look for the right one and keep dating but trust the Lord to get you the right soulmate.

Phil

[JerryNumbers]

Sometime back it hit me, why did I not ever date some of the girls I went to church and school with. They were all nice girls, some of them quite pretty. I think I thought more of those girls that I was around so much as friends, in a sisterly way. I think it might be that way for many.

I might add, some of the girls in my class were wonderful friends who I enjoyed being around and talking with them, but I never felt attracted to them.

I do know of 4 classmates that got married, one of them didn't last, the other one has surprisingly lasted thru many trials.

I was on my 21st year when I married.

[Angelmiss49]

Don't let it bug you Timothy. I have never been married for that matter.
Angelmiss