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What To Do With Wills


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Is it ever right or appropriate to refuse an inheritance?

When my Mom and Dad died, I never received anything from their possessions.

My Stepdad disowned me after preaching my Mom's funeral - and I never heard what was in the will (actually, the first time I thought of that was right now) - though I do believe my Mom would have given me family pictures and things of that nature. Some aunts and uncles went through some of her stuff. My sister was offered some books and certain possessions, etc. - but my Stepdad has also chosen not to keep in contact with her either.

When I went to my Dad's funeral, my Stepmom offered me some of his memorabilia (and he had a house and basement full of things like that) - but she stated she would go through it after the funeral and emotions wore off (ie. when she was not overwhelmed). I know that she planned on selling much of what the family did not want to take care of her bills. I never had the heart to ask her for anything - though it would have been nice to have something concrete to remember my Dad by.

Anyway, the reason I am posting this thread is because my Grandma on my Dad's side died last month, and I just received the papers referring to her will (though not what is in the will), stating her estate would be equally divided up among the family. I don't feel right in accepting an inheritance (however big or small it might be) when she was never really part of my life. She was the one (indirectly) who paid for my plane ticket to go to my Dad's funeral (my aunts decided that together, and the one aunt who had the authority to pay bills and delegate her funds, etc. - don't remember what this was called - paid for my ticket out of her funds).

Is it rude or callous of me to refuse this inheritance? Can I just sign it all over to my Stepmom - to help her out? Would that be taken as some kind of rejection of my Grandma, and be offensive to the family somehow?

I have never received anything from any wills from any relatives, plus as I have stated - including my parents - so I really am unsure what to think or how to proceed here. Looking for advice. Some of her estate is based on bonds that will mature sometime in December, so I do have a little bit of time to make up my mind on this issue.

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I'm not up to snuff on contesting wills (I think refusing an inheritance would come under that category - maybe not). Could you possibly go ahead and accept your inheritance and then give it to your stepmom? There is a possibility (don't know Canadian law) that if you refuse your part, it would be divvied up between the others. But if you accepted it, you could then dispose of it as you wish (unless the will is entailed).

I think it's a great thing you want to do for your stepmom!

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Is it rude or callous of me to refuse this inheritance? Can I just sign it all over to my Stepmom - to help her out? Would that be taken as some kind of rejection of my Grandma, and be offensive to the family somehow?


Talk it over and find out. Tell them that is what you are thinking of doing and feel out the reaction.
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I think your best bet Jerry, would be to either speak to the attorney that drew up the will or the executor of the will. You said you received papers, so they had to come form someone of authority, I would imagine.

I don't think they can make you take it if that is what you desire. But, if you wish a certain disposition, unless spelled out differently in the will, they should agree to your conditions. A kind explanation to your stepmother and family as to the reason for your decision should not create any ill feelings. You could do this personally (letter / phone call / visit) or through said attorney or executor.

If you inheritance includes the bonds, and you cannot transfer them to another for some reason (although I think that unlikely as well), take them, let them mature, cash them in and then send the proceeds to your stepmother.

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Thanks for the input so far.

Do you have to declare an inheritance? If I receive the bonds and there is some value to them, and I then pass them on to my Stepmom, and I going to find out that I am taxed for them (or that I need to declare them)?

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I believe the taxes paid are paid by the estate and not the beneficiary (US). Best to check with the attorney.

If you want your stepmom to receive the benefit then accept the gift and give it to her. Declining the portion may result in it being spread over several individuals as opposed to your stepmom.

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