Obedience to one's parents

[HappyChristian]

Most homes are not godly and most children don't have godly parents; unfortunately.

If godly parents (or any parents) are giving their children commands that don't directly violate the Word of God, I believe the child should obey.

You say if a parent tells a child to do something illegal they should report it to the police. That's the same thing as saying the child shouldn't obey the parent in such situations which makes it seem as if we agree on this.

No - I don't think it's the same as not obeying. I think it's God's way of protecting the child from stupid parents without the child having to disobey.

I think, too, that if we teach children to obey parents...but make the caveat that if they tell them to do something that is against God's Word they don't have to obey, we are opening the door to rebellion. Kids who know the Bible could come up with some good reasons to flout parental authority. I have actually seen it done. Children who are taught to obey their parents without question will more likely be willing to obey God without question once they are grown.

[John81]

I never said we have to teach a child to obey unless...

It should suffice to teach children to obey their parents, period. It's my hope that a child would have enough sense, or if in Chirst pay heed to the Holy Ghost, so that they would not obey a command to steal, kill or become prostitutes if such a command were ever to come from their parents without the need to have been told.

And yes, if a child is told by his parents to kill their neighbor, and that child goes to the police instead, that child has not obeyed that command by the parents, but I don't believe they are sinning.

[Selah]

I never said we have to teach a child to obey unless...

It should suffice to teach children to obey their parents, period. It's my hope that a child would have enough sense, or if in Chirst pay heed to the Holy Ghost, so that they would not obey a command to steal, kill or become prostitutes if such a command were ever to come from their parents without the need to have been told.

And yes, if a child is told by his parents to kill their neighbor, and that child goes to the police instead, that child has not obeyed that command by the parents, but I don't believe they are sinning.

Right. And also what if the kid is saved and his/her parents are not...and the parents want him/her to become a prostitute or kill or injure someone. I think it would be a much better witness to refuse and do what's right. In the end, God will have last word with the parents...but I doubt how much of a Godly example would be shown by giving in to a command like that. but I also agree that someone who is spiritually intune with God (prays a lot) should trust God in that kind of circumstance...because God will provide a way to do right without disobeying your parents. Anyway not arguing...just my opinion. I'm just a young 16-year-old that don't know much. :lol

[Pastorj]

I grew up with unsaved parents. Through prayer and communication, my parents never made me do anything that was agains Scripture. Remember, what you are teaching is called situation ethics and is unbiblical.

Here's a Biblical solution

Parents: Child, do something against Scripture
Child: Goes and prays about it, allows God to work on parents, then goes and asks parents to not require him to do something that goes against Scripture.

The impact of this will be that they will see he is trying to live by the Word of God and will come to know Christ. This is the same manner that a wife is to follow with an unsaved husband.

Let's follow Scripture and not add to it.

[Selah]

ummm...I'm not adding to Scripture, and I'm not teaching. I was merely stating my opinion, NOT arguing. I didn't come in here to start a fight.

and I didn't say you couldn't ask to not have to do it...

[Pastorj]

ummm...I'm not adding to Scripture, and I'm not teaching. I was merely stating my opinion, NOT arguing. I didn't come in here to start a fight.

and I didn't say you couldn't ask to not have to do it...

I wasn't speaking to your post directly, just to the topic.

[Selah]

ok sorry to be so quick on the defense there...

[HappyChristian]

I grew up with unsaved parents. Through prayer and communication, my parents never made me do anything that was agains Scripture. Remember, what you are teaching is called situation ethics and is unbiblical.

Here's a Biblical solution

Parents: Child, do something against Scripture
Child: Goes and prays about it, allows God to work on parents, then goes and asks parents to not require him to do something that goes against Scripture.

The impact of this will be that they will see he is trying to live by the Word of God and will come to know Christ. This is the same manner that a wife is to follow with an unsaved husband.

Let's follow Scripture and not add to it.

:goodpost:

[John81]

I grew up with unsaved parents. Through prayer and communication, my parents never made me do anything that was agains Scripture. Remember, what you are teaching is called situation ethics and is unbiblical.

Here's a Biblical solution

Parents: Child, do something against Scripture
Child: Goes and prays about it, allows God to work on parents, then goes and asks parents to not require him to do something that goes against Scripture.

The impact of this will be that they will see he is trying to live by the Word of God and will come to know Christ. This is the same manner that a wife is to follow with an unsaved husband.

Let's follow Scripture and not add to it.

That's great and if the Lord works it out that way, fantastic! But we all know sometimes the Lord requires us to take a stand ourselves.

It's not adding to the Word to obey God rather than man.

[godsgurlie_077]

Can you show me this from Scripture? Is there a Heirechy with God's commands?

If you can disobey your parents, how about lying every now and then? What other commandments can we break in order to follow another command?


Enough questions, what you are talking about is called situational ethics and is not found in Scripture. We cannot break one command in order to follow another. There are always more options than just the two: obey parents and disobey God or obey God and disobey parents.

Well here is an example say your parents are not christians and they don't agree with you being a Christian and told you never to go to church. Are you going to not go to church just because you parents said I don't think so, or say your parents told you to swear you are not going to swear and make God upset you are going to say no I don't want to swear at least I hope so

[Selah]

Well here is an example say your parents are not christians and they don't agree with you being a Christian and told you never to go to church. Are you going to not go to church just because you parents said I don't think so, or say your parents told you to swear you are not going to swear and make God upset you are going to say no I don't want to swear at least I hope so

Actually I knew a lady whose husband didn't allow her to attend church. She obeyed him, and in the end God blessed her and her husband got saved. I think it was because she was humble enough to submit to God and him, and it was a good witness to her husband. So I wouldn't rate not going to church as a horrible sin..as long as you're honoring your parents/husband like the Bible says and its not in rebellion towards God.

[godsgurlie_077]

Actually I knew a lady whose husband didn't allow her to attend church. She obeyed him, and in the end God blessed her and her husband got saved. I think it was because she was humble enough to submit to God and him, and it was a good witness to her husband. So I wouldn't rate not going to church as a horrible sin..as long as you're honoring your parents/husband like the Bible says and its not in rebellion towards God.

ya sorry that was the first thing that came to my mind but aren't husband and parents different in a sense and should a Christian be marrying a non Christian because in the Bible it says "Do not be unequally yoked with non-believers do not mix light with darkness. I think it depends on the situation but you are obviously not going to go against the Bible to listen to your parents.

[Selah]

ya sorry that was the first thing that came to my mind but aren't husband and parents different in a sense and should a Christian be marrying a non Christian because in the Bible it says "Do not be unequally yoked with non-believers do not mix light with darkness. I think it depends on the situation but you are obviously not going to go against the Bible to listen to your parents.

I think they were married before she got saved. but you are right- it does depend on the situation. no matter what else anyone says, not everyone goes through the same things so unless we've gone through it we really shouldn't judge anyone else...and I'm not accusing anyone on here or trying to argue so please don't get upset. :lol it's just my :2cents

[God's Tool]

I believe a child should obey their parents unless the parents tell them to do something in direct violation of the word of God. A child can refuse to obey a wicked command in a respectful manner and still be honouring their parents.

The Lord will never require us to do evil, but if we do not follow out the command of the authority over us (ie., parents) then we can expect their punishment whether correctly or wrongly given. "Servants, be subject to your masters with all fear; not only to the good and gentle, but also to the froward. For this is thankworthy, if a man for conscience toward God endure grief, suffering wrongfully. For what glory is it, if, when ye be buffeted for your faults, ye shall take it patiently? but if, when ye do well, and suffer for it, ye take it patiently, this is acceptable with God."

So then expect to reap the consequences of your actions, but take joy in knowing that the Lord is on your side!

[Madeline]

The fifth commandment is in a category all on its own and stands for our need to obey secular authority generally. So we can apply what we know of God's attitude in respect of obedience to authority generally to this issue in particular. While it is occasionally - very rarely - permissible to disobey secular authority when it directly contradicts a divine commandment, generally speaking this will almost never be the case in practise. Both Peter and Paul are extremely clear in their mandates to obey even unfair authority (Rom.13:1-5; 1Pet.2:13-15), and remember we are talking about the Roman Empire in their day whose attitude toward Christianity was anything but beneficent. Cases of disobedience, moreover, almost always require the humble acceptance of the consequences even though they are unfair (Peter and the apostles being flogged for preaching the gospel, Daniel being thrown into the lion's den for praying, Daniel's friends being thrown into the fiery furnace for refusing to worship the king). Look at the example of Jesus. In His youth He lived in complete obedience to His earthly mother and step-father, and if anyone had a claim on "knowing better" and needing to "follow God rather parents" it was certainly our Lord. Nevertheless He remained "in obedience to them" even when they didn't understand why He had remained behind in Jerusalem (Lk.2:51-52). So in my view the course of action recommended here seems reasonable enough in principle - when in any doubt, obey. Unless it is a case of criminal behavior that is at issue, there are very few instances where a child who is still under his/her parents roof should not obey them, not just out of necessity but "for conscience' sake" (Rom.13:5).

Love,
Madeline