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i hope you are all doing well and the Lord and the world is smiling at you with mercy.

i have got a huge problem, i have had it for many years but it has gotten worse and now it is getting very intolerable. 

i live in China, but i am not Chinese, i am from Persia (Iran), i moved here 13 years ago and married a Chinese lady and we have been together since.

She has been my guardian angel all the while and i love and respect her so much.

Unfortunately because of my birth and passport, i am not allowed to enjoy many things one expects to have after 13 years of living here.

i have not a work permit, nor a resident's visa yet! i get a visa to stay, but that's all i get, which to be fair enough is great, i do not want to go back to Persia, not as long as the islamic fanatics thing is going on, and i might be in danger of some sorts, mainly because i have converted from islam to Christianity.

i do not know what to do, i am in utter pain, my wife is tired of working hard and it is quite understandable but there is nothing i can do about it. 

She is mad at me because i cannot make money, as if i chose to be Persian, or as if i knew this would be my situation after so long.

i am a Master of Arts in English language and literature, i used to be a university lecturer back home and here during the first couple of years, but then the rules changed and i was not hired any more. i am also a photographer, a musician, and an artist, i play chess, too.

There is nothing i do that can help me make any amount of money, i used to have a small apartment and i taught English there, but then the police somehow found out and came and took me in and questioned me, and i was shocked to find out that i couldn't even teach private lessons, that required work permit, too! So i was warned to shut it or if i was caught again, i would be fined more than 20,000 Yuan, which is a lot of money here. i asked the officer why are they taking in a teacher rather than catching the thieves, and they got mad, so i shut up.

Oh, and if you are wondering why my brother or sisters do not help and send me money, the answer is simple, everyone has their own problems, they would if they could, but they have their own issues. i have many rich cousins, but you know the problem with the rich, if they gave away money or spent it, they wouldn't become rich in the first place!

My Jesus is asleep and no matter how much i cry for help, he doesn't want to wake up.

So here i am, asking you kind people to pray for me and help me wake my Jesus.

Bless you all,




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Psalm 143:


Hear my prayer, O Lord,

Give ear to my supplications:

In Thy faithfulness answer me,

And in Thy righteousness.

And enter not into judgement with Thy servant:

For in Thy sight shall no man living be justified.

For the enemy hath persecuted my soul;

He hath smitten my life down to the ground;

He hath made me to dwell in darkness,

As those that have been long dead.

Therefore is my spirit overwhelmed within me;

My heart within me is desolate.

I remember the days of old;

I meditate on all Thy works;

I muse on the work of Thy hands.

I stretch forth my hands unto thee:

My soul thirsteth after thee, as a thirsty land.


Hear me speedily, O Lord;

My spirit faileth:

Hide not Thy face from me,

Lest I be like unto them that go down into the pit.

Cause me to hear Thy loving-kindness in the morning;

For in thee do I trust:

Cause me to know the way wherein I should walk;

For I lift up my soul unto thee.

Deliver me, O Lord, from mine enemies:

I flee unto Thee to hide me.

Teach me to do Thy will;

For Thou art my God:

Thy Spirit is good;

Lead me into the land of uprightness.

Quicken me, O Lord, for Thy name's sake:

For Thy righteousness' sake bring my soul out of trouble.

And of Thy mercy cut off mine enemies,

And destroy all them that afflict my soul:

For I am Thy servant.




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i came back to say: i think i understand better now, and thank you for your thoughts and prayers.

John 15:

12 - This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you.

13 - Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.

14 - Ye are my friends, if ye do whatsoever I command you.

15 - Henceforth I call you not servants; for the servant knoweth not what his lord doeth: but I have called you friends; for all things that I have heard of my Father I have made known unto you.

16 - Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go and bring forth fruit, and that your fruit should remain: that whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, He may give it you.

17 - These things I command you, that ye love one another.

18 - If the world hate you, ye know that it hated me before it hated you.

19 - If ye were of the world, the world would love his own; but because ye are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hateth you.

20 - Remember the word that I said unto you, The servant is not greater than his lord. If they have persecuted me, they will also persecute you; if they have kept my saying, they will keep yours also.

21 - But all these things will they do unto you for my name's sake, because they know not him that sent me.

22 - If I had not come and spoken unto them, they had not had sin: but now they have no cloke for their sin.

23 - He that hateth me hateth my Father also.

24 - If I had not done among them the works which none other man did, they had not had sin: but now have they both seen and hated both me and my Father.

25 - But this cometh to pass, that the word might be fulfilled that is written in their law, They hated me without a cause.

26 - But when the Comforter is come, whom I will send unto you from the Father, even the Spirit of truth, which proceedeth from the Father, he shall testify of me:

27 - And ye also shall bear witness, because ye have been with me from the beginning.

John 16:

1 - These things have I spoken unto you, that ye should not be offended.

2 - They shall put you out of the synagogues: yea, the time cometh, that whosoever killeth you will think that he doeth God service.

3 - And these things will they do unto you, because they have not known the Father, nor me.


i am comforted, i hope the Lord will give me enough power to endure and i will try to be patient.

Best wishes and may the Lord bless your hearts,


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I just saw this, @Totoosart. I'm sorry for all you are going through. I do hope that the government will relent and grant you a work visa. 

Storms are a part of the Christian life - we live in a sin-cursed world, and troubles abound. Jesus is not asleep. He is there, even if at times it doesn't feel like it. He is the Master of the winds, waves, and life. Keep your eyes on Him rather than the rambunctious waves and He will see you through.

Read Matthew 14:22-32.  Many people focus on Jesus and Peter walking on the water, but miss the beginning of the story. Jesus SENT them into a boat...He CONSTRAINED them. That word means "press urgently." Jesus knew the storm was coming, and He pushed his disciples to go out on the water. 

Jesus used that incident to teach the disciples, and us, to keep our eyes on Him (Is. 26:3-4). Yes, the waters calmed when He stepped into the ship. Many times Jesus stops the storm. But there are other times that He allows the storm to continue. Regardless of the type of storm or the duration, we need to keep our eyes on the Lord. He promises perfect peace to us when we do - note that there is no promise that the storm will cease. Peace in the midst of the storm is priceless.

Never, ever think that Jesus is asleep. He slept while here on earth because He was in His physical body. He is no longer, and He does not sleep. He is there with you, loving you, wanting you to rely on Him and learn and grow to be more like Him every day. 

Will be praying.

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