Members John81 Posted January 6, 2015 Members Share Posted January 6, 2015 Hope these old tombstone epitaphs are still funny to you. Harry Edsel Smith of Albany, New York: Born 1903-Died 1942 Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the car was on the way down. It was. ****************************** In a Thurmont, Maryland, cemetery: Here lies an Atheist All dressed up And no place to go. ****************************** In a LondonCemetery Jokes, England cemetery: Here lies Ann Mann, Who lived an old maid But died an old Mann. Dec. 8, 1767 ***************************** In a Ribbesford, England, cemetery: Anna Wallace: The children of Israel wanted bread, And the Lord sent them manna. Old clerk Wallace wanted a wife, And the Devil sent him Anna. ****************************** In a Ruidoso, New Mexico, cemetery: Here lies Johnny Yeast. Pardon me For not rising. ****************************** In a Uniontown, Pennsylvania, cemetery: Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake. Stepped on the gas Instead of the brake. ****************************** In a Silver City, Nevada, cemetery: Here lays The Kid. We planted him raw. He was quick on the trigger But slow on the draw. ****************************** A lawyer's epitaph in England: Sir John Strange. Here lies an honest lawyer, And that is Strange. ***************************** John Penny's epitaph in the Wimborne, England, cemetery: Reader, if cash thou art In want of any, Dig 6 feet deep; And thou wilt find a Penny. ***************************** In a cemetery in Hartscombe, England: On the 22nd of June, Jonathan Fiddle Went out of tune. ***************************** Anna Hopewell's grave in Enosburg Falls,Vermont Here lies the body of our Anna - Done to death by a banana. It wasn't the fruit that laid her low, But the skin of the thing that made her go. ****************************** On a grave from the 1880s in Nantucket, Massachusetts: Under the sod and under the trees, Lies the body of Jonathan Pease. He is not here, there's only the pod. Pease shelled out and went to God. ***************************** In a cemetery in England: Remember man, as you walk by, As you are now, so once was I. As I am now, you soon will be. Prepare yourself and follow me. To which someone replied by writing on the tombstone: To follow you I'll not consent Until I know which way you went ****************************** Last add, from Boot Hill, in Tombstone, Arizona: Here lies Lester Moore One slug from a 44 No Les No More Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Administrators HappyChristian Posted January 6, 2015 Administrators Share Posted January 6, 2015 Funny! :-D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Standing Firm In Christ Posted January 6, 2015 Members Share Posted January 6, 2015 Here is the picture of the Tombstone of Jonathan Blake in Uniontown, PA...http://findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=gr&GSln=Blake&GSfn=Jonathan&GSbyrel=all&GSdyrel=all&GSst=40&GScntry=4&GSOB=n&GRid=39158322&df=all& Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Standing Firm In Christ Posted January 6, 2015 Members Share Posted January 6, 2015 http://findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=gr&GSln=Juvenales&GSfn=Pancrazio&GSbyrel=all&GSdyrel=all&GSOB=n&GRid=102824294&df=all& Pancrazio Juvenales: Good Husband, Good Father, Bad Electrician. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Miss Daisy Posted January 6, 2015 Members Share Posted January 6, 2015 some had quite a sense of humor I wouldn't of thought back then they'd put on a stone! very impressive quips Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Standing Firm In Christ Posted January 6, 2015 Members Share Posted January 6, 2015 http://findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=gr&GSie=1&GRid=93564336& James J Butler "Buzz" "Poke You In The Eye. Miss You." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members heartstrings Posted January 6, 2015 Members Share Posted January 6, 2015 A baby was born and his parents named him Odd. He went through school being teased mercilessly. Even when he went to college, people couldn't leave it alone; they had to comment on his weird name. He was so very sick of it, but knew there was nothing he could do. The last straw came, when, well into a successful career, he was presented with an award by the chamber of commerce. The presenter apparently believed he was funny, and proceeded to embarrass Odd with a roast-like monologue. Odd seethed, but again could do nothing. But finally, finally he had had enough. That night, he told his wife that he wanted to be buried with a blank gravestone. Nothing on it, no dates, no sentiments and most of all he did not want his name on the gravestone. He didn't want people making fun of him when he was gone. Time passed and so did Odd. Now, when people walk through that cemetery and see the blank gravestone, they wonder at it for a bit, and then say, "Hmm. That's odd . . . " Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Standing Firm In Christ Posted January 6, 2015 Members Share Posted January 6, 2015 Porter H. Waite Birth: Jul. 4, 1892 Swarthmore Delaware County Pennsylvania, USA Death: Dec. 23, 1975 Inscription: PORTER H. WAITE DEC. 23, 1975 HI EVERYONE! HAVE FUN, SEE YOU LATER Burial:Media Cemetery Media Delaware County Pennsylvania, USA Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Standing Firm In Christ Posted January 6, 2015 Members Share Posted January 6, 2015 David Van Orsdale Birth: Jun. 28, 1928 Death: Jan. 13, 2007 Riverside Riverside County California, USA Dates and last residence from US SS Death Index. 1930 US Census (Houston, TX) Born in Texas Father: Allan A. Van Orsdale (b. 1892 in CO) Mother: Edith A. Van Orsdale (b. 1896 in PA) Family links: Parents: Edith A. Van Orsdale (1895 - 1987) Inscription: Devoted Son Husband Father Grandfather "I'd rather be here than New York City" Burial:Oak Park Cemetery Claremont Los Angeles County California, USA Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Standing Firm In Christ Posted January 6, 2015 Members Share Posted January 6, 2015 Mary H. Sweat Birth: Sep. 18, 1938 Death: Apr. 14, 2002 Inscription: Lord love a duck Burial:IOOF Memory Gardens Cemetery Livermore Alameda County California, USA Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Standing Firm In Christ Posted January 6, 2015 Members Share Posted January 6, 2015 Danny E. Sturms Birth: Aug. 3, 1949 Parsons Tucker County West Virginia, USA Death: Aug. 22, 2007 Hendricks Tucker County West Virginia, USA Inscription: I Fold Burial:Fansler Cemetery Hendricks Tucker County West Virginia, USA Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Standing Firm In Christ Posted January 6, 2015 Members Share Posted January 6, 2015 Birth: May 2, 1923 Hyrum Cache County Utah, USA Death: Apr. 19, 2007 Sedro-Woolley Skagit County Washington, USA Coy B. Albretsen Shillinger Married George Samuel Shillinger Died Apr. 19, 2007 Sedro-Woolley, Skagit Co., WA Burial at Burlington, Skagit Co., WA Family links: Parents: Julius Fritz Albretsen (1882 - 1939) Jennie O. Jensen Albretsen (1896 - 1984) Spouse: George Samuel Shillinger (1916 - 1994) Siblings: Coy B Albretsen Shillinger (1923 - 2007) Mary Jean Albretsen Seversen (1924 - 2013)* Julius LaVoy Albretsen (1929 - 2005)* *Calculated relationship Inscription: 5 BRATTY KIDS DONE HER IN Burial:Green Hills Memorial Cemetery Burlington Skagit County Washington, USA Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Salyan Posted January 6, 2015 Moderators Share Posted January 6, 2015 That poor Miss Mann! They had to go and keep giving her a hard time about being single even when she was dead! One of the funniest tombstones I've run across is in the country east of Camrose, AB. There's a lady with the name Alberta Beach buried there. Why is that funny? About half an hour west of Edmonton is another town callled... Alberta Beach. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Standing Firm In Christ Posted January 6, 2015 Members Share Posted January 6, 2015 Sandy Shoreshttp://www.findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=gr&GSln=Shores&GSfn=Sandy&GSbyrel=all&GSdyrel=all&GSOB=n&GRid=24540190&df=all& Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Standing Firm In Christ Posted January 6, 2015 Members Share Posted January 6, 2015 Earl Eugene Riser (Early Riser)http://www.findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=gr&GSln=Riser&GSfn=Earl&GSmn=E&GSbyrel=all&GSdyrel=all&GSOB=n&GRid=119131837&df=all& Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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