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18 Signs that You’re a Fundamentalist Preacher That Might Need to Study More for Your Sermons


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18 Signs that You’re a Fundamentalist Preacher That Might Need to Study More for Your Sermons

1. You consider studying for sermons something that lib’rals do instead of soul winning.
2. You prepare your sermons on the way to church, which explains why you recently preached against tan lines, energy drinks, and men wearing short sleeve shirts.
3. You actually make fun of preachers who use Greek and Hebrew in their sermons.
4. You consider volume a fine substitute for substance.
5. To you, “exegete the Greek” is a funny rhyme.
6. You decide on what sins to preach against based on who’s in the congregation.
7. You consider a pulpit more of a punching bag rather than a place to rest your Bible.
8. You have 35 sermon outlines prepared and ready to preach – as soon as you find text verses for them.
9. In a 117 minute sermon, you spent 53 minutes telling stories from your childhood, 47 minutes telling stories from your early ministerial days, 15 minutes denigrating men who wear pleated pants, and 2 minutes explaining your text verse.
10. You have actually spent an entire sermon preaching against the evils of Barney the purple dinosaur.
11. You’re favorite illustrations are Darwin’s deathbed conversion, the “microphone in hell” bit, and Spurgeon giving up his cigars.
12. You quote John Gill as supporting your position against Calvinism.
13. You think people who know what “supralapsarianism” means need to get saved.
14. You think its okay to preach a verse out of context, as long as you tell your people that you’re doing it on purpose.
15. You love to apply Messianic prophecies to yourself.
16. When you preach, you can’t help but say “evangelical” effeminately.
17. You think “expositional” is someone who doesn’t take a position on anything.
18. You’re not sure what TULIP stands for, but you know you’re against it.



So what are your thoughts on this? There are some good points there, but it OBviously was done to mock Fundamentalism.
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As with most such things there are aspects of truth therein.

About two years ago I listened to a preacher give an hour or longer sermon. He read a couple of verses of Scripture, told a couple of jokes, discussed events from his life which led down several rabbit trails with scattered jokes, more from his life and eventually he got back to the original verses very briefly, talked about how sometimes the Spirit leads him away from what he expected to preach, said a quick prayer and that was it.

What was his message? I really don't know!

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I think its hilarious.

This "IFB extremism" has done more, in my opinion, to push people farther from "Godly living" than anything else. Preaching "thus saith the Lord" is one thing but once men started preaching "thus saith the preacher", people started getting sick of church...and while its not a good excuse, it was a pretty widespread thing, in some circles, almost cult-like, for awhile there.

And although I know this is supposed to be making fun of preachers and that's not a good thing...I've known preachers that fit totally into a few of those. Yikes, eh? The Barney thing and the pleated pants are too funny...and I've totally heard those "illustrations" before! haha!!!! And I had a preacher one time that preached a message called something about the south rising again and took it from something in the Old Testament with Abraham...too funny about the taking things out of context. Another big one was way back when that Bible printing guy was going around using the verse "where is the scribe?" to promote Bible printing. haha. (Just use the Great Commission verses and you're good!!!)

Seriously I think the church needs to just get back to the Bible. Unfortunately its too "boring" these days and its certainly not the best way to "get people", or not around here where we are, anyway. (My hub is more expository style, he does not roam around preaching "stuff" but he uses Scripture and stands behind the pulpit.)

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I take the other side of this. This list fits any other type of preachers not just fundamentalists. I know preachers that aren't fundamentalist that fit quite nicely with this list. It is more of a human prOBlem, rather than a fundamentalism prOBlem.

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I take the other side of this. This list fits any other type of preachers not just fundamentalists. I know preachers that aren't fundamentalist that fit quite nicely with this list. It is more of a human prOBlem, rather than a fundamentalism prOBlem.


No doubt many aspects fit other preachers as well. Many of the unsaved pastors and those of the watered down variety love to spend more time telling stories and jokes than actually expounding upon the Scripture.

Surveys continually say more and more pastors don't even write their own sermons, they get them from books and these days an increasing amount download sermons off the internet to read to their congregation.

It's rather common for many pastors to take a stand for or against something without really knowing the facts. How many mainstream pastors quote Mother Teresa or MLK without a clue of what these people stood for and believed.
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I agree John. I'm glad that at least in New England we see this shallow type of preaching very rarely. It is exciting to me to see more preaching around here that is well thought out, studied, and prayed over. I see a shift of what God is doing in New England, and it is exciting. More and more churches are starting, it is nice to see a little aspect of revival coming back to New England.

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I agree John. I'm glad that at least in New England we see this shallow type of preaching very rarely. It is exciting to me to see more preaching around here that is well thought out, studied, and prayed over. I see a shift of what God is doing in New England, and it is exciting. More and more churches are starting, it is nice to see a little aspect of revival coming back to New England.


Praise God! Such is greatly needed and not just in New England.
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I agree John. I'm glad that at least in New England we see this shallow type of preaching very rarely. It is exciting to me to see more preaching around here that is well thought out, studied, and prayed over. I see a shift of what God is doing in New England, and it is exciting. More and more churches are starting, it is nice to see a little aspect of revival coming back to New England.

What part of New England are you from? I was just up in New Hampshire a month or two ago, visiting Trinity Baptist in Concord.
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In the church we did attend this was all too common.

The pastor preached with great zeal, but the messages were a "reach" more often than not. He'd use 1 Greek word for love (when there were many) 1 Greek word for Repentance (when there were many in both Hebrew and Greek).

The verse by verse teaching (only on Wednesdays) would start with him explaining the text and then the message would denigrate to him getting off on some tangent that prOBably didn't really relate to the text.

To our shame many so called bible colleges are doing away with teaching bible Greek and Hebrew.

If we are to preach expository messages we must understand the context and syntax as well. I could be wrong.

Lastly, I was talking with a good friend last night. We were talking about a very popular preacher that preaches a lot of revivals here and on the east coast. He said when he (that preacher) isn't telling so many stories he's pretty good. Pretty telling huh?

Respectfully Submitted

Br Steve

Gal. 2.20

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What part of New England are you from? I was just up in New Hampshire a month or two ago, visiting Trinity Baptist in Concord.


I'm from southern New England, Connecticut that is.
Did you like New Hampshire? It is such a beautiful state.
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I'm from southern New England, Connecticut that is.
Did you like New Hampshire? It is such a beautiful state.


Yes, I really enjoyed my visit. Loved the cape/colonial style architecture as well as the landscape. It was my first visit so far north; hope it's not the last.
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We need good Gospel/Bible preachers in old England. TBH I haven't researched preachers to check against that list, but when when most are involved in "Churches Together" or other ecumenical activities, then the Gospel is lost to them.

Add healing & entertainment, & a lack of discernment encouraged by TV & radio ministries & we fall into the state of religious anarchy.

1Sa 3:1 And the child Samuel ministered unto the LORD before Eli. And the word of the LORD was precious in those days; [there was] no open vision.

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