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Thinking about adopting


ptwild

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As to nanny's being part of the family, I think they most certainly become a part of the child's family - at least in the child's mind. I wasn't a nanny, but I did a great lot of babysitting and at times lived with the families. The kids I took care of grew to love me very much, and I them.

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Well gee maybe he has something here. Just hire a nanny, then instead of divorce, you can just fire her.

Nanny, mom, dad, two dads, two moms, one dad, one mom, two nannies, one daycare, and a partridge in a pear tree..."We are family!"

LOL...

Whatever folks. LOL. Merry Christmas!

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Well gee maybe he has something here. Just hire a nanny, then instead of divorce, you can just fire her.

Nanny, mom, dad, two dads, two moms, one dad, one mom, two nannies, one daycare, and a partridge in a pear tree..."We are family!"

LOL...

Whatever folks. LOL. Merry Christmas!


Things that are different sometimes scare us, but that doesn't mean there is anything wrong with them.
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:lol: That would save some people a lot of money and legal hassle wouldn't it.


Wait a second. We may be on to something here. There are literally hundreds of thousands of orphans throughout the world. The stress and responsibilities of marriage are just more than a lot of people (not just men) care to take on. There is no doubt that in order to procreate, we need a man and woman married to one another, but we don't necessarily need that in order to have a child (see aforementioned orphans comment). A man no longer needs a woman (physically and literally) in order to have a child - he can just adopt. Therefore, a man can have a child without having premarital relations and without the chances of a future divorce, or even the chance of being hurt by one's spouse. My question is, and for the sole reason of discussion, are women now OBsolete for those of us who choose to be lifelong bachelors and fathers?
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No, pt - not OBsolete. After all, if lifelong bachelors adopt, they need a nanny. And they still have a mom. And so would their babies...


This assumes that the nanny must be female. Albeit, I've never heard of a male nanny, it's not an impossibility.
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I think he's trying to get us riled up LOL so I'm finished in this thread.... I'm enjoying Christmastime too much to worry about Boutique Dads.... haha.


I made it perfectly clear that it was just for discussion's sake. And I think you do every single dad a discredit with labels like "Boutique Dads." I know you are prOBably unaware of any way of life other than homemade apple pie, baseball and all the other cliche American family stuff, but this country and its way of life is so so small in the grand scheme of things. A family dosn't have a set of rules it must match up to. Sometimes it's one mom, sometimes it's one dad. Sometimes it's grandparents. I guess to you, all those dads and kids who have lost their wives and mothers, just aren't on the same level as us who are fortunate enough to have both parents. They're a littlt too "boutique" to be taken seriously.
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Wait a second. We may be on to something here. There are literally hundreds of thousands of orphans throughout the world. The stress and responsibilities of marriage are just more than a lot of people (not just men) care to take on. There is no doubt that in order to procreate, we need a man and woman married to one another, but we don't necessarily need that in order to have a child (see aforementioned orphans comment). A man no longer needs a woman (physically and literally) in order to have a child - he can just adopt. Therefore, a man can have a child without having premarital relations and without the chances of a future divorce, or even the chance of being hurt by one's spouse. My question is, and for the sole reason of discussion, are women now OBsolete for those of us who choose to be lifelong bachelors and fathers?


Seems you have already answer that question for yourself, that as far as your concerned women are OBsolete.

From all you've said seems there is at least 2 reason for your opinion, you don't want to answer to anyone, do as you please when you want to do, and fear of getting hurt.

Its best to have loved and lost, than never loved at all.

By the way, when one has a child they do not do as they please in the respect you speak of, they will sacrifice many times for the sake of their child. Love sacrifices, with the absent of love, there is no sacrifices.

God has proved what love is, by sacrificing His Son for us, Jesus proved love to us, laying down His life, sacrificing His life for us.

You keep saying you want your own son, but yet you refuse to go the route God has set up, you want to do it your way, you can't improve on God's way.
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PT, I think if God is leading you to adopt then go for it. As you have mentioned, the child that you would adopt at this point of time has no family. He does not have a father or mother or any other family. He does not have the unconditional love a father should give. He doesnt have a home to go to at Thankgiving or any other holiday. He doesn't have a father to get advice from. Whether you agree or disagree with boarding schools and nannys, this child would have a place to call home if PT adopted this child. I am sure PT would give this child the love a father gives and give his child attention. While PT may not realize the full responsibilities a child comes with, I believe he will stop up to the plate when it is time. If you do decide to adopt you may want to make sure it is a woman for a nanny, so she can give him the nuture of a mother.

That being said here is a website i found... http://uganda.adoption.com/ It may or may not help you out. Here is another one. http://statistics.adoption.com/information/statistics-on-cost-of-adopting.html Scroll down to intercountry fees. If I see my old teacher who adopted two kids from Korea, I will ask her more about the cost.

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pt just to clear things up...I said already in a previous post that I understand things happen to families. The part I do not agree with is someone actually planning to skip marriage "don't want to mess with it" and then just "buy" a kid....yeah, like a "Boutique Dad" really. If God would have wanted Dads to be Dads alone, He'd have made them reproduce. But instead he said "It is not good for man to be alone."

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PT, I think if God is leading you to adopt then go for it. As you have mentioned, the child that you would adopt at this point of time has no family. He does not have a father or mother or any other family. He does not have the unconditional love a father should give. He doesnt have a home to go to at Thankgiving or any other holiday. He doesn't have a father to get advice from. Whether you agree or disagree with boarding schools and nannys, this child would have a place to call home if PT adopted this child. I am sure PT would give this child the love a father gives and give his child attention. While PT may not realize the full responsibilities a child comes with, I believe he will stop up to the plate when it is time. If you do decide to adopt you may want to make sure it is a woman for a nanny, so she can give him the nuture of a mother.

That being said here is a website i found... http://uganda.adoption.com/ It may or may not help you out. Here is another one. http://statistics.adoption.com/information/statistics-on-cost-of-adopting.html Scroll down to intercountry fees. If I see my old teacher who adopted two kids from Korea, I will ask her more about the cost.


Thanks a lot.

As to Jerry and Kita, we, as Christians, are to care for orphans. God doesn't say that a man must have a wife in order to adopt. As far as not getting married, I'm just not emotionally attracted to the idea of it. St. Paul, a personal role model, wasn't married and even advised against it. For some reason, people have come to conclude that there is this rule that you must move away from mom and dad and get married and have kids and . . . And that is fine. But it's not a Christian requirement. There also is no prohibition against a single man adopting an orphan. You are more than free to believe there there should be such a prohibition, but, thankfully, God really doesn't care what you believe the rules should be. Fishtooth taco?
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