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Get Ready to ROFL! Join the Hilarity Brigade in Our Jokes & Humor Forum for Endless Laughter and Good Times! 
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Frist kid, my father is a plumber and he makes 20 dollars the hour Second kid, my father is a electrician and he makes 25 dollars a hour Third kid, my father is the pastor of the church, and it take 4 men to collect all his money every Sunday. Now you know the rest of the story...?
Last reply by TheGloryLand, -
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Some people wake up feeling like a million dollars! I wake up feeling like....INSUFFICIENT FUNDS! ?
Last reply by Jerry, -
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My buddy Jose went to see the baseball game last night. He told me after, he had climbed the flag pole during the game and everyone started to say, Jose can you see… Now you know the rest of the story ?
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One member said, our new pastor is like the new broom cleaning out the place. The other member said, I prefer the old pastor, his old broom knows where all the dirt is.
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09/14/21 Grif.Net - At Our House Overheard at our house . . . Bob: Honey, I think the new dryer is shrinking my clothes. Teresa: No, Sweetie. It’s the fridge. Bob: I am afraid I might be having memory issues. Teresa: How long has this problem been going on? Bob: What problem? Teresa: Look at the neighbors down the street, how lovely they look. He keeps holding her hand, kissing her, even holding the door for her. Why can’t you do the same? Bob: Are you crazy? I barely know that woman. Bob: I haven’t been sleeping well lately. Teresa: Well there goes the last of your talents. Bob: Doctor…
Last reply by BrotherTony, -
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There was a couple that was married 60 years sitting on a bench in the park. The man feeding birds with popcorn, His wife tells him, I admire you, he kept feeding the birds. Then she tapped him on the shoulder and says louder, I admire you, he then looks at her and said, and I am tired of you too. ? Now you know the rest of the story…
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A man and his wife visit a church to hear the service, he said it was very boring to his wife. During the service the preacher announced that there will be a meeting of the board after service in the back of the church. So the man visiting went after the service went to the back of the church. The pastor said welcome may I help you? The man visiting said, is this the meeting of the boring service ?
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Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
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Last reply by Bouncing Bill, -
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From the website GodsLittleAcre.net Kids Say the Funniest Things 2 01. HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming. - Alan, age 10 No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with. - Kirsten, age 10 02. WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED? Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then. - Camille, age 10 No age is good to get married at. You got t…
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Hanlon's razor, "never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity."
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Jenning’s Corollary The chance of the bread falling with the buttered side down is in direct proportion to the cost of the carpet.
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Creation An atheist scientist came to God and said, "We've figured out how to make a man without you." God said, "OK, let me see you do it." So the atheist bent down to the ground and scooped up a handful. But God stopped him and said, "Oh, no you don't. Get your own dirt!"
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There are two things you don’t want to see being made: sausage and legislation. Anonymous
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A preacher is being chased in the woods by a large grizzly bear. Exhausted, he fell to his knees praying, "Good Lord! Deliver me from danger!" Looking back he saw the bear kneeling, paws together in prayer and exclaimed, "It's a Christian bear! Thank God I am saved!" Meanwhile the bear started praying, "For this food I am about to receive, Lord, I give you thanks."
Last reply by Jim_Alaska, -
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Doughboy Falls at Age 71 Please join in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. Rumor has it that some uninvited Ho-Ho's also appeared. The gravesite was piled high with flours. Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy ros…
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Grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference. (Unknown author)
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The Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to do about their squirrel infestation. After much prayer and consideration, they concluded that the squirrels were predestined to be there, and they should not interfere with God’s divine will. At the Baptist church, the squirrels had taken an interest in the baptistry. The deacons met and decided to put a water-slide on the baptistry and let the squirrels drown themselves. The squirrels liked the slide and, unfortunately, knew instinctively how to swim, so twice as many squirrel…
Last reply by Jim_Alaska, -
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We are supposed to respect our elders. I have always tried to do just that. However, I noticed recently I have a problem. It is harder and harder to find someone more elderly that I. [Should I laugh or cry. This is so true for me.]
Last reply by Jim_Alaska, -
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I just found this website today, April 19, 2024. Never heard of him. Can you relate any experiences you've had concerning him or his ministry? From the home page: https://kjvevangelist.com/ "Psalm 138:2 I will worship toward thy holy temple, and praise thy name for thy lovingkindness and for thy truth: for thou hast magnified thy word above all thy name. Greetings in the Name of Jesus Christ, We are, Jack and Barb Koons; Evangelists to America, and as the Letterhead states; “Promoting the King James Bible, and Refuting Calvinism, and Arminianism”. After researching the King James issue since about 1990, and having written a book on the subject named “What is So Special About the King James Bible?”; God has called me to teach churches why we believe the King James is the inspired, inerrant, and preserved Word of God, for English speaking people. I am available to teach anything from a single lesson, to an entire conference on the King James. My book could also be used as a textbook at any seminary, standing on the King James. Furthermore, seeing how Calvinism (“Reformed Theology”) has been taking over many churches, and growing in popularity, (because it appeals to the supposed “sovereignty” of God); I also teach why this is a NOT a Biblical doctrine. I have written a book titled, “The Biblical View of Salvation”, which is a series of 173 lessons, which covers the Doctrine of Salvation from a practical perspective, and also refutes Calvinism, and Arminianism. I am available to teach anything from the basic Gospel message, to detailed messages presented at a revival, or such type meetings. Please explore the menu on this sight to see how Barb and I can be a service to you. Because the Lord is still on the Throne, Jack Koons" -
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- In the last nearly 7 months, there have been 2, major attacks, against the "jew", but we will call it Israel. OCT 7 was the first, and this is well documented, and now, a few days ago, you have Iran (Islam) attacking Israel in the middle of the night, as the devil loves the darkness....... Many many Ballistic , Cruise Missiles, and at least 200 Attack Drones were sent in by Islam (Iran) to try to kill Jewish citizens. Here are some photos, of a few of the Ballistic Missiles and a video. I wanted you to see the size of just ONE of the Ballistic Missiles so that you can get a real sense of just how much damage and death Islam was trying to again, inflict on the JEW., as they fired over 100 of these... and not just these. - - - - - -
Only "throw it out" if you are trying to offer it to God to be accepted by God. For example.. "God, i'll promise to stop sinning............will you save me now'"" ????? See that? "God says" = NO I WONT, as that is not my GRACE. and you are "saved by Grace", or you are not saved at all.
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